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joke time... 3/29/2006
Tarzan & animals went to the river to take a bath.
When Tarzan took off his clothes, all animals laughed
When Tarzan asked " WHY ? "
animals said : " Ur tail is in front! "
.......................
Q: Why do women wear black panties ?
A : For the memory of those who got buried inside !
Q: Why do men have to wear white briefs ?
A : To pretend that it's pure & never been ...
0 Comments, 113 Views,
4 Votes
,4.80 Score
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The Gift... wow exciting.. what do you think??? 3/29/2006
MAN: I want a birthday present for my wife.
SALESLADY: How long have u been married sir ?
MAN : 22 yrs !
SALESLADY: Bargain basement is on the left.
0 Comments, 114 Views,
0 Votes
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If you Love Someone set her/him free and other versions 3/25/2006
Variations :
If you love him, set him free,
if he doesn't come back,
HE'S PROBABLY WITH ME!
Pessimist:
If you love someone,
Set her free ...
If she ever comes back, she's yours,
If she doesn't, as expected, she never was Optimist:
If you love someone,
Set her free ...
Don't worry, she will come back. Suspicious:
If you love someone,
Set her free ...
If ...
0 Comments, 109 Views,
5 Votes
,5.10 Score
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Every Woman........ 3/24/2006
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
...one old love she can imagine going back to
...and one who reminds her how far she has come...
...enough money within her control to move out and rent
a place of her own, even if she never wants to and needs to.
...something perfect to wear if the employer or date of
her dreams wants to see her in an hour.
...a ...
0 Comments, 170 Views,
11 Votes
,5.97 Score
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The Post 3/23/2006
3 people ....me, myself and I ....
have asked me to post
I have nothing to say !!!!!!!!!
I don't care if you respond !!!!
Somewhere it is hot ...somewhere it is raining... somewhere
it is cold
Another weekend is about over and most of us are still single
L...
0 Comments, 156 Views,
9 Votes
,4.49 Score
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Isn't this Funny??? 3/21/2006
If a man talks dirty to a woman, its called sexual harassment.
But if a woman talks dirty to a man it costs 1 euro 99 cents!!!(per
min)!!!!
(while surfing in my break the Internet there was a Filipino
site i don't like to mention the name in here but it is
a true Joke)...
1 Comments, 273 Views,
13 Votes
,4.82 Score
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Life before the LAPTOPS AND COMPUTERS 3/21/2006
just a little something for all
those computer lovers......
> >
> > Memory was something you lost with age
> > An application was for employment
> > A program was a TV show
> > A cursor used profanity
> > A keyboard was a piano
> > A web was a spider's home
> > A virus was the flu
> > A CD was a bank account
> > A hard drive was a long trip on the road ...
0 Comments, 231 Views,
11 Votes
,4.48 Score
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Kwentong Jeepney 2/16/2006
Uuwi ulit akong mag-isa.
<br>
Haay, salamat naman at uwian na. Kanina pa ako inip na inip
umuwi, aba
ang hirap atang magpanggap na may ginagawa. Galing ko na
ngang matulog
ng dilat eh, sakit nga lang sa ulo. Paalis na sana ako ng biglang
nag-text yung pinsan ko at hihintayin nya daw ako sa baba
ng building
para sabay na kaming umuwi. Kaya hayun, nagsinungaling
na naman akong ...
2 Comments, 129 Views,
8 Votes
,5.33 Score
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MEN & WOMEN : THE DIFFERENCES 2/9/2006
NICKNAMES:
If Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch,
they will call each other Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle.
But if Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack go out for a brewsky, they
will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla,
Peanut-Head and Useless.
<br>
DINING OUT:
And when the check comes, Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack will each
throw in $20 bills, even ...
0 Comments, 98 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
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FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT MEN 2/9/2006
1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
<br>
2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
<br>
3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible.
In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to
recycle.
<br>
4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so ...
0 Comments, 95 Views,
7 Votes
,3.80 Score
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Answers to 5 of the toughest questions women ask... 2/6/2006
I found these on Romance 101 website: www.rom101.com and
had to pass them along.
<br>
Answers to 5 of the toughest questions women ask...
There are five things that women should never, ever ask
a guy, according to an article in Sassy magazine ... women
ask them anyway.
The five questions are :
<br>
"What are you thinking?" "Do you love me?" "Do I look fat?" "Do you ...
0 Comments, 101 Views,
6 Votes
,3.93 Score
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You decide 2/4/2006
Eve Strikes a bargain
<br>
<br>
<br>
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord,
I have a problem!"
<br>
"What's the problem, Eve?"
<br>
"Lord, I know you created me and provided this beautiful
garden and all of these wonderful animals and that hilarious
comedic snake, but
<br>
I'm just not happy."
<br>
...
0 Comments, 74 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
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100 Reasons Beer is Better than Women 1/30/2006
100 Reasons Beer is Better than Women
<br>
1.You can enjoy a BEER all month.
2.BEER stains wash out.
3.You don't have to wine and dine a BEER.
4.Your BEER will always wait patiently for you in the car.
5.When BEER goes flat you toss it out.
6.BEER is never late.
7.HANGOVERS go away.
8.A BEER doesn't get jealous when you grab another
BEER.
9.BEER labels come ...
0 Comments, 95 Views,
3 Votes
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How did You know???? 1/25/2006
HOW DID YOU KNOW??
<br>
I remember so well
The day that you came into my life
You asked for my name
You had the most beautiful smile
<br>
My life started to change
I'd wake up each day feeling alright
With you right by my side
Makes me feel things will work out just fine
<br>
CHORUS
<br>
How did you know
I needed someone like you in my life
...
0 Comments, 100 Views,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
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50 Ideas about women 1/24/2006
(Relationship Humor Article)
<br>
1. Women love to shop. It is the one area of the world where
they feel like they're actually in control. 2. Women
especially love a bargain. The question of "need"
is irrelevant, so don't bother pointing it out. Anything
on sale is fair game. 3. Women never have anything to wear.
Don't question the racks of clothes in the closet;
you "just don't ...
0 Comments, 77 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
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Take her to paradise with your kiss!!! 1/10/2006
Take her to paradise with your kiss!!!
<br>
At the end of a first date comes that awkward moment when
you must decide if you want to kiss her or not.
Also, if you do kiss her it had better be good to make a favorable
impression. It may not be fair, but some single women will
judge you on your first kiss as to whether she would be attracted
to you want to date you again.
...
0 Comments, 69 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
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Why do men cheats? 12/20/2005
Guys please don't be offend about this.I just want
to ask about this?I want to know why?My cousin really wants
to know why?
1 Comments, 182 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
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ACCEPTING WITHOUT CHANGING 11/24/2005
if you really someone, you have to accept whoever she/he
is.whatever it takes.just because someone doesnt love
you in the way you want them to, doesnt mean that they dont
love you with all they've got.
0 Comments, 124 Views,
7 Votes
,4.31 Score
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Make up your Mind 11/10/2005
Tell me, what is it with people these days? Breaking up is
a thing of the past, at least a clean break is! I don't
see what the hesitation is to depart from the jaws of life(excuse
the analagy I used, but come on)get real. Why do people both
male and female, I'll be sure to implament both sex,
because I don't want to come off as byass. Some people
have a problem with separation, I ...
2 Comments, 113 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score
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A Man's Guide to PMS 9/26/2005
Folks,
<br>
I couldn't help not sharing this from my female best
friend (thank you cdl107!). As a wine connoisseur, she
loved this one...
<br>
=======================================
<br>
A Man's Guide to PMS
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month
when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life
in his own hands!
...
3 Comments, 298 Views,
11 Votes
,1.67 Score
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Online Dating 9/23/2005
and Dad were having quality time as both were admiring
how wonderful Mom is. The compliments came to an unexpected
question...
asks: "Daddy, where did I come from?"
Dad says: "Ah, my , I guess one day you will need
to find out anyway!" and ponders how to put it in words
the lad can understand.
"Well, " he finally says, "you see your
Mom and I first got ...
0 Comments, 222 Views,
8 Votes
,4.17 Score
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HOW TO CONTROL EMOTIONS !!!! 9/22/2005
This is a very good reminder for all of us.
<br>
<br>
This would give you guides on how to control your emotions
towards your better-half, friends, officemates and all
the people around you, especially your "boss".
The rules of practicing "ugaling langit, ugaling
kaaya-aya" :
<br>
<br>
#1 Ang naunang magalit ang may karapatang magalit. ...
1 Comments, 122 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
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Battle of the Sexes 9/22/2005
Never try to outsmart a woman!
There was a man who had worked all his life, had saved all
of his money and was a real miser when it came to his money.
Just before he died he said to his wife, "When I die.
I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with
me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me."
<br>
<br>
And so he got his wife to promise him ...
0 Comments, 126 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score
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A Virgin Tale 9/22/2005
Why you shouldn't die a virgin......
<br>
A Virgin Tale
In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age,
she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew
her last days were getting closer, so she told the local
undertaker that she wanted the following inscription
on her tombstone: "Born as a ...
0 Comments, 132 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
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Words with Two Meanings (Not the way the Webster's Dictionary would define) 9/20/2005
1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female = Any part under a car's hood.
Male = The fastener on a woman's bra.
<br>
2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female = Fully opening up one's self emotionally to
another.
Male = Playing football without a cup.
<br>
3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female = The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with
one's partner.
...
0 Comments, 85 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score
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Life Without Love Is Nothing !!!!!!! says michico999 9/19/2005
This 36-year-old woman from Cavite is one of the latest
additions in this group. So as usual, let's give her
the warm welcome.
<br>
Profile for michico999
"im a simple minded person enjoying a simple life
with simple dreams!!!
<br>
Ideal Person:
im looking for a sincere, responsible and honest to goodness
person who will accept me for what i am...someone who will ...
1 Comments, 118 Views,
0 Votes
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THE KITCHEN 9/19/2005
A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5-year-old
playing with his new electric train in the living room.
She heard the train stop and her saying, "All of
you sons of [#@!$] who want off, get the hell off now....cause
this is the last stop! And all of you sons of [#@!$] who are
getting on, get your asses in the train...cause we're
going down the tracks." <br>
The ...
0 Comments, 85 Views,
9 Votes
,5.56 Score
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MISS PHILIPPINES 9/19/2005
The Setting: Pageant Night - Miss Universe Beauty Pageant
Question and Answer Portion.
<br>
The Finalists: Ms. America
Ms. Spain
Ms. Britain
Ms. Iran
Ms. India
Ms. Philippines
<br>
<br>
Question: Ms. America, how do you describe a male organ
in your country?
<br>
...
0 Comments, 77 Views,
7 Votes
,5.08 Score
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What Bugs You? 9/16/2005
Out of boredom, a man who was in prison for so many years decided
to train a cockroach to do tricks, sometimes errands for
him. He trained it to do circles and flips with just hand
gestures. He even trained it to get cigarettes from nearby
prison cells. All of this took so many years of patience
and trial and error skills.
<br>
Finally, the day came that he got paroled. As soon as ...
2 Comments, 104 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
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Love is Like Gambling 9/4/2005
Hi folks,
<br>
I hardly ever gamble, even if Las Vegas is my old stomping
ground, but i reckon I sure share this:
<br>
"Love is like Texas Hold'em Poker. Chip leader
or not, before you push all your chips forward and say, {I'm
all in!}, make sure you have the winning hand. Unlike money,
no one should go bankrupt in love. It will really take time
to earn it all back. ...
4 Comments, 185 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
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