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Reconciliation; another lesson from my journey. Me: "Whenever we can, we should visit people first rather than places because people will not be around forever but places stay." I did practiced what I preached in my recent trip to Arizona and boy the result of that was more than I expected. Let me go back in time a little. You see, I had a falling out with my former in-laws over some silly matters but later I found out that they cheated us of some money. They were all mean, narrow minded and one sided. They did not want to listen to us, they brush us off. We apologized , though we did not need to yet it fell on deaf ears.So I closed all form of communication with them. Incidentally that event brought me here in FFF. There was no one to talk to so I searched for a Filipino forum to vent out and on my search FFF appeared. At that time I was very angry and I have no intention of having any form of ties or communication with my ex in-laws. I hated them, did not want anything to do with them and neither did they. That was almost a year ago now. Fast forward about 1 month ago. I met an old time friend in USA and in our conversation I mentioned about my in-laws. At that time he has just been from a church service and the teachings were about reconciliation. He said what are the odds that you talk to me about your anger and here I am ready to share to you about reconciliation. He even showed me a video of Rick Warren's teaching. In his teachings pastor Rick talked about the 7 Steps on How to Resolve a Conflict and Restore Relationship. ( I may blog about that in details later.) According to him the only way to resolve a conflict is to face it. Wow I thought is it a coincidence or is it a real message to me? I did learned a lot from his preaching so I did try it. To cut the story short I made the first move, I reconciled with my in laws. Visited them in Arizona and gave them genuine loving hug.. I did not even say anything about our conflict, my sentiments or my anger. Tears fell from my mother in-laws ayes when we left them. Like the saying goes; action speaks louder than voice. Two days later my in laws called my and they apologized to her. They were tearful. The bitch in me is grinning and says: who's sorry now and who is laughing now? The good one in me says: Thank you God for enlightenment and peace. It was a real relief to get a conflict resolved. The heaviness in my chest is gone. I am happier and at peace with myself. The anger that crippled me temporarily disappeared. I sleep better knowing I can manage my own conflict. I am now also emotionally stronger. Heard the song "let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me,?Are you in conflict with anyone? Do you find it hard to forgive and forget? If you focus on the benefits of resolving the conflict, then you will probably take the initiative to reconcile. Do it , it's worth it. “Use the quotation for the occasion; do not make an occasion for the quotation.” |
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