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FEELING UNLOVED....  It is bad enough that you are alone, most of your life And yet, you did everything you could to improve the lives of those people you cared about, your family. But what did you get in return? Are you really appreciated? Or all along, they feel that they are entitled to the fruits of your hardships, difficulties and sacrifices? and that they must have a share of all that you've got, regardless of the situation and where you are? Why do you feel abused, unloved, and un-cared for after all these? Do you have the right to be rebellious and start cutting the cords? Why is it that it's only now, you feel that your selflessness wasn't really helping these same people to value your real worth? You gave too much, and wasn't given anything back! not even a bit. It hurts, doesn't it? It hurts because all you did was loving them all, and providing most of their needs, and yet, you get nothing in return! You don't hear from them, unless they need more help, in terms of , yeah, financially, that is. It seems that you have a dollar sign written on your forehead. No one cares if you cry from loneliness, or having sleepless nights just because whenever you get sick, no one cares for you. When you have problems, you have no one to talk to . People will accuse you of having bad choices, and decisions. That life is what you make it, and that you did it all to yourself. So now, what? Are you going to sulk in one corner, just because? No Ma'am! No Sir!...I am just having a respite, a much needed break, and will reflect on the most important things that needed to be fixed. Most of all, with the help of the Almighty, let me fix myself...I will. |
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Just venting here, just like the old times. THere is no better place to release the pent up feelings than at FFF.
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Kawawa ka naman! Question Tags in English I see you have the self-same issue my once-upon-a-time wife had with question tags  See, you made me think of her, not often I do that!It hurts, isn't it? (doesn't it? I cannot remember what gets blocked in comments, but try this: https://www.grammar.cl/rules/question-tags.gif www.grammar.cl slash rules slash question-tags.gif
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Kawawa ka naman! Question Tags in English I see you have the self-same issue my once-upon-a-time wife had with question tags See, you made me think of her, not often I do that!It hurts, isn't it? (doesn't it? I cannot remember what gets blocked in comments, but try this: https://www.grammar.cl/rules/question-tags.gif www.grammar.cl slash rules slash question-tags.gif 
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I truly reconcile with your feelings because i have been away also for sometime, detached from the people, i was with for months and it felt so bad that i would just sulk and not leave home..that was in bahrain, it was very fortunate on my part that i didn't get to sign my contract then due to the outbreak of the Gulf War, so I didn't have to stay long in that country. Adjusting to their culture was also a toll that co-incided with my thoughts about home and family. My ex-husband would always talk about money matters, on the pretext that our children needs so and so. But all along I heard he was not actually looking after them well but instead, lived like a bachelor, always with his peers having a good time and leaving my kids on their own. How would you feel when you work with your ass because you want to provide what's best to your children but your support seemed not falling into the right hands? What compounded my problem with supporting the kids was learning their father didn't enrol them in that school year I was first away. He loaned or lent the money to his cousin, with a promise of 5/6 income on it. I learned about it only when I arrived home and it was already mid-chool year. The Lord guides us in what we do. When we do good he retuns them in many fold, that is the consolation you can have.
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and i would also like to add that these people do not realize, the struggles and hardship an overseas filipino worker experiences in the other country..they think it is always good life for them..if they only knew working more than 12-16 hours per day has often become a norm, just to be able to send what is needed for sustenance in the philippines...
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I truly reconcile with your feelings because i have been away also for sometime, detached from the people, i was with for months and it felt so bad that i would just sulk and not leave home..that was in bahrain, it was very fortunate on my part that i didn't get to sign my contract then due to the outbreak of the Gulf War, so I didn't have to stay long in that country. Adjusting to their culture was also a toll that co-incided with my thoughts about home and family. My ex-husband would always talk about money matters, on the pretext that our children needs so and so. But all along I heard he was not actually looking after them well but instead, lived like a bachelor, always with his peers having a good time and leaving my kids on their own. How would you feel when you work with your ass because you want to provide what's best to your children but your support seemed not falling into the right hands? What compounded my problem with supporting the kids was learning their father didn't enrol them in that school year I was first away. He loaned or lent the money to his cousin, with a promise of 5/6 income on it. I learned about it only when I arrived home and it was already mid-chool year. The Lord guides us in what we do. When we do good he retuns them in many fold, that is the consolation you can have.  I am just learning about this part of your life, since the first time I met you. I know, we are not the only ones. Most of the people who worked or are still working overseas experienced this dilemma. But, I guess, it is our culture. Some good and some bad outcomes of supporting family and relatives.
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and i would also like to add that these people do not realize, the struggles and hardship an overseas filipino worker experiences in the other country..they think it is always good life for them..if they only knew working more than 12-16 hours per day has often become a norm, just to be able to send what is needed for sustenance in the philippines... 
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I see you perceive well enough intentioned language corrections as criticisms, so I won't offer them henceforth. My students choose ME precisely because I do selectively correct them, but then you did not choose ME after all! You did however choose TO lament your family's demands in public in this blog (ME being a word which in lower case sometimes gets deleted too)
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