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indeed! sometimes in the midst of trying to define someone we erred on making false assumptions by just the virtue of reading what they posted or in manner their share their engaging thoughts in the chatroom.
do we have the right to make assumptions of others without having thoroughly knowing who they are? at what point do we know someone anyway? would it be enough that by conversing with someone on the chatroom - viola! we certainly know how they are or who they are and what they are.
its hard to validate assumptions specially giving in a timeframe that is to irrational and only based on gut feelings. perhaps was given at a point when somehow unknowingly you have offended someone, bruised their ego or unintentionally invaded their space or at a point wherein you are not in the best of mood. regardless there is nothing wrong with providing assumption and yet there is also nothing wrong in refuting the fallacy of assumption. would i refute assumption? i would not. the burden of truly knowing me is on them. they must on the course of their lives must know me extensively if they want me to be a part of their lives.
be as it may, some of us becomes victim of a false assumption and suddenly most become convinced because of that false assumption that you are indeed such and such without them actually knowing you in an extended period of time.
they said that i have a high regard of myself and that nakarating lang ako sa america ay kung sino na ako. everyone must have a high regard of themselves. by mostly having that, its the foundation of having a healthy life and then acquiring an excellent perspective of life. but to assume that someone only having a high regard of themselves because of where they are or have been or dahil nakarating sa america is making a mockery of one's insecurity.
none of us has the purity of values and therefore assumptions are sometimes false and never right specially given at a point that one never was closed to you or have been intimate with us.
i was not offended by the assumptions accorded on my behalf, after all eveyone has the right to make assumptions and even share it with many. but to others it could be dismaying experience to the point that to them it becomes a nightmare because they have been ill defined by virtue of that assumptions. but no one could ever define us except ourselves. and if you have a high regard of yourself, then nothing matters including false assumption.
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marry for money!
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Jul 23, 2009 11:42 am
1069 Views
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By Liz Pulliam Weston
Young women, here is some advice:
"Don't throw your hot, youthful selves away on young, financially unproven men. They may never become successes, and if they do, they'll probably just chuck you for younger models when you're too old to successfully compete again in the marriage marketplace.
Instead, marry rich guys while you're still taut enough to snag them. They may dump you, too, but at least you'll have nice, fat divorce settlements with which to pursue true love, or the pool guy, whoever comes first."
hmmmmm!
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27
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you don't excites me anymore!
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Jul 19, 2009 12:05 pm
969 Views
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is there more in marriage than just having sex? what are they? at my age, i just couldn't figure out the advantages of being married.
would you care to share what's in it for me?
if you says regular sex. what if i don't want that anymore and that i am just happy to settle for occasional sex. what if i still want it regularly and more, but you just don't excites me anymore. sex is primarily a domain of excitements and its not about a product of companionship or obligation.
yes at my younger age, i was always excited about sex because of your younger and sexy body and your wild orgasm. if i have to be excited with sex, therefore i should marry someone who is so young. no offense to anyone, but its just one of the facts of life! sex to enjoy it more requires strenuous physical activity for most. but if we are both in old ages, how far would we go beyond cuddling? its a heavy price to be married for just cuddling! 
looking back i thought i made myself available then to women because of sex and i couldn't just do that now. partly because of diminishing opportunities for a younger women who wants it from a much older men too - without quid pro quo.
i wonder what is really the true reasons for much younger women to marry an older man. i'd seen pinays in their late teens and early 20s marrying someone in their 70's. do i have to believe they married for love and not for security? there is nothing wrong with that. on the other hand, they are admirable for their practicalities. love sometimes does not put food on the table and roof on one's head, but practicality does! good for them women of practicality. i salute you!
if the reason for marriage is for companionship, would i not be able to get that from someone without the benefit of marriage? how about from friends or have about having quite a number of women friends that will provide that companionship. hmm who knows i could be lucky with friends who are willing to provide certain extra benefits. but with money in old age, even if they there to take advantage of you, you are swirled by friends nevertheless.
being not married on the other hand is totally awesome, for the most part, you maintain your freedom and no one messing up your mind, making you feel guilty and obligatory on many things like answering to questions such as:
where have you been? how come you didn't even call? are you having an affair? what's wrong with you? etc! etc! ect! and blah! blah and blah!
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19
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kept it humbly to themselves!
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Jul 16, 2009 1:54 pm
755 Views
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i just don't know what to write, but let's see where my thoughts would bring me. but this must be short because i am at work on a break.
i guess i must admit that i should have been more circumspect and not shared those things that were too apparently sort of boastful to others, like how much i earned and how much i forgo for overtime because i rather have the time for myself instead of working OT.
my earnings i thought at this time is too minuscule compared to others who earns more than i do and yet they just kept it humbly to themselves. i have been remissed in such respect and i am sorry.
i don't know why at times i want to be provocative and invites animosity from others. maybe i just want to be taken by someone who are willing to ignore my shortcomings and then accept my imperfections. that to her my honesty is the most endearing quality that i have. i thought one can't be wrong by being honest. the foundation of a sustained successful relationship is honesty.
but to love someone inspite of his or her imperfections is remarkably one of the truest form of love. its beyond magical and earthly.
we can never be wrong by being humble and there are dangers in being boastful. being misunderstood is just a small part of it, but the biggest danger is not being able to present one real self to the one truly deserving of one's love.
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8
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i have to see you to love you!
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Jul 14, 2009 10:06 pm
867 Views
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i have been here for quite sometime now. in some measures it could have been a lifetime considering i am now 57 and yet my handle still shows younglooking55. yes i started here when i was 55.
yes two years could be measured in many ways. it could have been a sordid waste considering until now i am yet to be taken. for awhile i thought i was taken and she found me, my gift from heaven (please read "my final blog" to relate and my other blog, "a gift from heaven"). but then i found myself putting it on hold and then severing that ties (please read my blog putting it on hold and another blog in quandary so you could relate.)
yet on the other hand the last two years could be considered years of reckoning and retrospection - looking back with nostalgia and likewise with deepest appreciation for a life that has been, penned and shared in my blogs sometimes perceived being conceited, arrogant, annoying and obnoxious. unwilling to be accepted by others that its nothing but a life story in retrospection to document and to share if you wish and with your indulgence.
in the process i came to know the true character and temperament of quite a few in the bloglands. i give them respect by not viewing their blogs and not contradicting their thoughts. hmm i am out of sync here. forgive me please!
but the saddest and perhaps truly excruciating experience i had here in fff is when i fall in love with someone just barely into my days being here. gosh i felt so lucky that in just a short period of time i found someone to love.
she was in her late 20s she said and her picture was adoringly beautiful that i thought i was out of her league. there is no way i thought someone of her beauty will love someone of my kind, much older than she was. i have to believe that she was indeed the person in the pic and there is no way that she could be deceitful.
she worked in the hotel industry and therefore believably should be beautiful. but the truth was, it was never close to that industry.
when someone you thought is out of your league take a chance on you, you are not only flattered but likewise truly captured by the rare opportunity that could only happen to the truly deserving of magical moments in one's life.
the emails led to chatting to the ym and then with daily and constant phonecalls. but the mystery was, in spite of my persistent asking to reveal herself in the cam, she managed to elude for quite sometime until that time she has to finally come to terms with her deceit. in short i fall in love with a picture, with the chat, with the phonecalls and the idea how i was out of her league.
with that experienced i decided to leave fff. for whatever reason after 7 months i found my way back and then became an accidental blogger based on the false assumption of the chatters in the ELR.
with the lesson learned, i am now guarded and unwilling to love someone unless she reveals herself and she is not deceitful.
i have to see you to love you!
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11
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would you care to be my wife?
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Jul 11, 2009 8:08 pm
1546 Views
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if i have to reinvent myself and be productive in my retirement years, i would like to have a small intimate cozy restaurant, not necessarily for profit but something to do and it would be a place for friends to hang around.
if there at least 10 percent profit after operating expenses deducted, 15 percent of that profit will be donated to the orphanage.
the ambiance would definitely be romantic, and the musics are classical, ballad and jazz. there will be a piano around the corner and from time to time i will play the saxophone.
the menu will not be necessarily pinoy but combination of few dishes around the world like paella, spaghetti fruta di mare, thai and grilled seafood.
the prices would be so reasonable that one would enjoy and desires to visit more frequently - not necessarily only because of the food but for the extraordinary experience of the ambiance, of the service, of the music and of course the friendliness of friends around you.
the attire will be casual and no bluejeans allowed on friday and saturday and no smoking either.
hmm could i impose no smoking in my own small intimate cozy restaurant in the philippines? probably not! hmm this is just going to be just a dream until smoking is banned.
would you care to be my partner or my wife and help me run this small intimate cozy restaurant? i should be retiring in less than 5 years.
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45
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simple pleasure of orgasm!
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Jul 9, 2009 9:53 pm
927 Views
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yes we are not deserving to others, specially those others who have high expectations and regards of themselves and looking for almost of their own kind and calibers. those with phd, doctorates does not settle for lesser than they are. but then their pool of choices are limited and somehow wind up emotionally empty inside, and thus have no choice but to continually focus in furthering the success of their careers.
and then what? devoid of experiencing a personal relationship with someone and unable to relate about and with the simple pleasure of orgasm. most of them and specially for those who are already in the late 30s will never experience the joy and the fulfillment of being a mother or a parent. yes women of success do pay a heavy price - unwanted and ignored by simple men who has nothing to offer but love, caring and affection.
but some do settle and impregnate themselves by artificial means, and whoala by freak of nature or technology, they too becomes a mother.
yes my kind and all the things i wrote about myself in my blog including the wisdom of my experiences or checkered past, none of these women of success would dare to care that i too have the capacity to be settled, that i am in my age and stage of life being endearing to have and to love.
would it be shameful that these women of success, we do find them here too? or the funny thing is, no matter who we are, that we are all the same; longing for something that none of our material and high and esteemed educational success would be able to deliver. there is equality in the way which we live our lives - that we all get empty feeling inside no matter how successful we are in our careers or how high we have attained an education and successfully enriched ourselves in material things.
the beauty of being poor and have less in life is that its easy to have a relationship. look around statistically, women of less ambition, less sophistication and less of material things in life, they make up for so much more in relationship and then children. yes they do marry and have children at a young age.
so women of success, would you dare to have a relationship with someone who have less in life - how about just an ordinary jeepney driver or tricycle driver who can love you so dearly?
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17
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everything must be considered!
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Jul 6, 2009 9:07 pm
706 Views
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i answered ms mysterious1 comments on my blog, "its not that easy to find the right one," with this blog.
my take!
thanks for your thoughts. there is one particular religion in the philippines that it would be hard to make a breakthrough if you really love someone from that religion, specially for a guy!
my youngest is also exposed to that religion and she has friends in that religion. however whenever she befriend someone from the group, the parents would asked if she is part of that religion and then knowing she is not, then she is frowned upon. however her best friend here in california is from that religion. they hang around a lot whenever she is here with me for a visit. the mother of my daughter's friend is not a part of that religion, but the father is. but its the mother who brought the father here in america.
i attended the mass of that religion 7 times na ata. twice when i was in rome, italy and at least 4 times here. i prefer a religion that leaves me alone instead of being monitored. i prefer the privacy and my personal relationship with HIM without others trying to convince me otherwise that i am wrong.
one time i attended a filipino baptist congregation in norfolk, virginia, right there at that moment they were trying to save me.
i know i am a sinner and i admit that everyday and ask for forgiveness and then thankful for all my blessings, but to push it and say i must accept their religion to be saved, i think is out of context of respect for all other religions.
i offer my apology now if i am offending anyone. religion is one of those topics i tried to avoid, but eventually if you want to pursue a relationship - then it must be a part of the discussion and consideration in being involved in that relationship. its better to discuss it earlier in the initial stage of the relationship than later when both of you are really have invested time and emotion.
you see its not that easy to pursue a relationship. to be in love is the easy part, but to live that love in good terms with someone, then everything must be considered.
again thanks for your thoughts! so do we have a problem in our or with our religion?
Her thoughts!
***** Religion, generally speaking , was one of the major culprit of debates , even separation or divorce, it could start in just one ordinary dinner conversation, or in a friendly group discussion , it goes and ends with dissensions amongst group of people, and more so in relationships, specially if it goes down to marriage, people in union , at times tend to ignore this topic out of love , but later it plays a major role when its been applied on a daily life basis. Surely there will be unending disruptions when it comes to personal beliefs and that includes differences of each family's opinions & approval of it's own religious practices, rituals & culture . so YES, I agree to this , it does affect relationships of both parties, and each one should consider religion seriously, as one of the major factors and as a true basis for a solid foundation of a loving relationship to last long & succeed. all it takes is'..One love'..one faith '..one goal'... one road to travel for one lasting journey to a unified & unending love & contentment of peaceful bliss of happiness TWOgether forever ! ( wow! ang tindi nito noh, parang nakakasakal yta? hahaha !over na ba? lolz! Again, thanks for sharing '..but this is one interesting topic really ! * maraming salamat po uli '..& GOD BLESS ! *****
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2
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its not that easy to find the right one!
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Jul 6, 2009 1:51 pm
779 Views
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you thought you found someone that would at least met your expectations and love her the best you got. not only you felt strongly for her, but she also has all these qualities you thought are essentials in making your life enjoyable and wonderful.
she has the looks, she has the intelligence, she has the temperament, the common sense approach, she has the life experiences and she has that positive perspectives about life. all should be well and fine in loving her throughout the rest of your life. yet suddenly, its not going to work. the difference is just too minor, she and her family have a strong belief and faith in their religion.
yes the two things that most of us hated most to discuss and disagree with and then compromise are politics and religion. of the two, religion is the one near and dear to our hearts and is the one which most of us are unwilling to give up or compromise.
what if she belongs to a religion or to a faith that dictates that they can only have relationship or can only marry someone in their faith - that disobedience could mean the consequence of being disowned by your own family. that its a precondition to convert before solemnizing the marriage. yes there are still religions that would do that to you, not only disowned you but will forever bear grudges against you, if you go against their will.
if you truly love someone, would you embrace her religion?
but then, what does it says to your own faith if you subordinate it to loving someone. would it not be pretentious that you embrace the religion because you love her? maybe or maybe not!
i believe that when one embraced a religion, it must come from within and not as pre-condition such as in loving someone. nor it should be a quid pro quo.
there are also couples who are comfortable living their lives and loving each other by practicing their own faith and religion or mutually practicing both religion without imposing that one is preferred over the other. why can't it be the same for all of us, that we love someone not predicated on our preferred religion?
my faith is between me and my God. i believe that all religions are but creation of men, that religion for the most part are the source of conflict throughout the world. the continuous quagmire in mindanao is about religion.
i have been exposed to many religions, but until now i have not fully embraced one particular religion. i grew up with the mastery of the latin verses when we do the Angelus. i have attended the masses, ceremonies and rituals of many religions. they are all similar and have one common denominator - belief in God.
would you think its appropriate to surrender your own faith in exchange of being with someone you love?
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9
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elusive but not impatient!
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Jul 5, 2009 5:43 pm
770 Views
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this is a lengthily reply to the comment posted on my blog by ms mysterious1. i made it a blog instead on commenting on her comment on my blog, "i wish i knew who you are."
ms mysterious1, are you the one watching me since the beginning or just along the way or in the midstream? regardless i am glad that you dropped by frequently and read my blogs. my sincerest thanks.
i could be elusive but not impatient. how long i have been blogging and yet until now i am still wandering and hoping that i would be found by someone i truly like - which is not a character of an impatient man.
i think i honed my patience while i was in the military, wherein we don't rush things to get things done. take for example whenever i took a military flight to fly me to distant places, i have to arrive at the airport 3 hours early. i still do that now whenever i catch a flight, being at the airport 2 to 3 hours early.
in my appointments i am always early. my recent eb with two ladies of the FEEL about two weeks ago, i was there at the venue two hours before they got there - to make sure i am there. but i was never nor did i show impatience that they showed up 10 minutes late. i was just glad that they showed up.
i believe i honed my patience with my two daughters too. i do go with them shopping or trip to the mall and sometimes it takes them more than 3 hours to shop, and it doesn't bother me.
i did take them too to many trips to the amusement parks like disneyworld and six flags and it doesn't bother me to stay in the park as long as they want. i had road trips with them too that sometimes i have to drive 8 hours or more to arrive at the destination. you see i have a lot of practice of being patient as a father to my kids!
there you go! i am trying to contradict your thoughts that i maybe an impatient man. i am far from one!
when one wants someone on his own terms, of course its a process and therefore there is an aura of elusiveness. i maybe perhaps elusive because i am serious and no longer want to play. i have the luxury of being elusive because i know what i want, and even if i don't get it, i will be fine.
thanks for sensing that i have an endearing qualities too that you described in your comments. it could be true and i think its true. ayan you are not in good graces with those who abhor my conceitedness because of your kind words. but thanks again!
Ms Mysterious thoughts below:
**** Well you're a very interesting man to know '..and besides men of your caliber really intrigued us women ! uhmm'... just reading your blogs you seem so elusive and impatient , should I say you , despite being so defensive, the fact that you at times, seem arrogant for some , you still forgot to see our own side, our sensitivity about how can we come into our own terms , when it comes to having a relationship w/ you ! that is' ..IF its deem possible >>>>> hahahaha ! UY! joking lang po! No'.. seriously '.... you have a way to make us smile & grin in setting your own terms, waaaaaah! Hala ! ang lupeeet mo po ka antonio! But still as for me , I'm still here reading your blogs, and would love to make comments , because the truth is '... behind those writings, tho it sometimes raised some ladies eyebrows, Still'...I can sense that deep down in your heart remains the charm, the kindness, the sweetness, romantic, passionate & loving side of you ! O'..AYan po ha? bilis ba bumawi? SMILE PO ! BATI TAYO HA?
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To link to this blog (younglooking55) use [blog younglooking55] in your messages.
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