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indeed! sometimes in the midst of trying to define someone we erred on making false assumptions by just the virtue of reading what they posted or in manner their share their engaging thoughts in the chatroom.
do we have the right to make assumptions of others without having thoroughly knowing who they are? at what point do we know someone anyway? would it be enough that by conversing with someone on the chatroom - viola! we certainly know how they are or who they are and what they are.
its hard to validate assumptions specially giving in a timeframe that is to irrational and only based on gut feelings. perhaps was given at a point when somehow unknowingly you have offended someone, bruised their ego or unintentionally invaded their space or at a point wherein you are not in the best of mood. regardless there is nothing wrong with providing assumption and yet there is also nothing wrong in refuting the fallacy of assumption. would i refute assumption? i would not. the burden of truly knowing me is on them. they must on the course of their lives must know me extensively if they want me to be a part of their lives.
be as it may, some of us becomes victim of a false assumption and suddenly most become convinced because of that false assumption that you are indeed such and such without them actually knowing you in an extended period of time.
they said that i have a high regard of myself and that nakarating lang ako sa america ay kung sino na ako. everyone must have a high regard of themselves. by mostly having that, its the foundation of having a healthy life and then acquiring an excellent perspective of life. but to assume that someone only having a high regard of themselves because of where they are or have been or dahil nakarating sa america is making a mockery of one's insecurity.
none of us has the purity of values and therefore assumptions are sometimes false and never right specially given at a point that one never was closed to you or have been intimate with us.
i was not offended by the assumptions accorded on my behalf, after all eveyone has the right to make assumptions and even share it with many. but to others it could be dismaying experience to the point that to them it becomes a nightmare because they have been ill defined by virtue of that assumptions. but no one could ever define us except ourselves. and if you have a high regard of yourself, then nothing matters including false assumption.
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i apologize
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Aug 18, 2009 10:02 am
1009 Views
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things got heated on my blogs. comments that should not have been made was made. those who should not have gotten involved got involved.
its all my fault. i thought i was just provocative, that most everyone would just go about their lives and not be pissed off with my being conceited, arrogant and by being obnoxious.
but Carmi0403 and DonatoNY's nerves got busted and they have to say something not expected from someone who are rational in their thoughts and actions.
i apologize to Carmin0403 and DonatoNY because if not have been for my blog, they would not have uttered the heated words in my blog nor Jester PJ02 and Wayward-wind would made a comment on my defense.
i don't know if there are lessons learned. perhaps there is, that we must treat a blog as a blog and not personally offending anyone. i thought when i write of something i generalize except my own portrayal of being conceited, arrogant and obnoxious. and add show off there too.
my own personal solution is to be tempered in my blogs. but that's not my style. all i know is i am provocative but never directly attacking anyone or characterizing anyone. but if i do seem doing that, i apologize.
again i apologize. its all have been me. its my fault.
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11
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i fervently hope they are!
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Aug 15, 2009 7:26 pm
1077 Views
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sharing with you the preamble of my blog written on the day i started blogging. i think its very relevant now and essential to be read considering their are barrages of condescending characterization of yours truly - short of, if they have their way, committing me to the abyss of mental destitute.
the sad part is, inspite of what they wrote and said, i have given them a measured and respectable response with admiration of the kind of person they are. but so with my own fallacy of assumption, would they be really respectable, dignified and humble in their day to day demeanor as i characterized them to be? who knows? but i fervently hope they are.
not in one word i portrayed them less of a person in my measured responses to them. on the contrary, i have put them on the pedestal as those type of person we long for and will treasure. again i fervently hope they are!
here its goes, my preamble: the fallacy of assumption.
"indeed! sometimes in the midst of trying to define someone we erred on making false assumptions by just the virtue of reading what they posted or in manner their share their engaging thoughts in the chatroom.
do we have the right to make assumptions of others without having thoroughly knowing who they are? at what point do we know someone anyway? would it be enough that by conversing with someone on the chatroom - viola! we certainly know how they are or who they are and what they are.
its hard to validate assumptions specially giving in a timeframe that is to irrational and only based on gut feelings. perhaps was given at a point when somehow unknowingly you have offended someone, bruised their ego or unintentionally invaded their space or at a point wherein you are not in the best of mood. regardless there is nothing wrong with providing assumption and yet there is also nothing wrong in refuting the fallacy of assumption. would i refute assumption? i would not. the burden of truly knowing me is on them. they must on the course of their lives must know me extensively if they want me to be a part of their lives.
be as it may, some of us becomes victim of a false assumption and suddenly most become convinced because of that false assumption that you are indeed such and such without them actually knowing you in an extended period of time.
they said that i have a high regard of myself and that nakarating lang ako sa america ay kung sino na ako. everyone must have a high regard of themselves. by mostly having that, its the foundation of having a healthy life and then acquiring an excellent perspective of life. but to assume that someone only having a high regard of themselves because of where they are or have been or dahil nakarating sa america is making a mockery of one's insecurity.
none of us has the purity of values and therefore assumptions are sometimes false and never right specially given at a point that one never was closed to you or have been intimate with us.
i was not offended by the assumptions accorded on my behalf, after all eveyone has the right to make assumptions and even share it with many. but to others it could be dismaying experience to the point that to them it becomes a nightmare because they have been ill defined by virtue of that assumptions. but no one could ever define us except ourselves. and if you have a high regard of yourself, then nothing matters including false assumption."
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8
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why are you overreacting?
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Aug 14, 2009 9:05 pm
1322 Views
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why are you overreacting? its just a blog and then since the beginning i have been so conceited, arrogant and obnoxious anyway in this forum or fff. what 's the difference now that you seemed so patronizing how i live my life. hmm maybe you just find me so deplorable and wacky that i merit your chasm. 
or perhaps you don't have the capacity to be tolerant of the idiosyncrasies of others, and the things that does not conform to your personal standards or values are therefore anathema to you. and its imperative that you must say something to have him or her or me toe the line of your thinking and absurdities. 
what does it says about us if every time we read a blog that sort of more than annoying, we try to depict and dissect his or her unusual abnormalities and paint him or her as grotesquely undeserving of our attention.
hmm its just a blog and should not merit more than a normal reaction. if a blog does bother us, then be engaging - but please let spare the personal characterization if we could. i said if we could, if not then be so it. let's fire our salvo at all cost! 
but after the salvo, what have you got in return? my personal humiliation at your hands i supposed ha? so be it that way, congratulations and i bow to you and perhaps to others too! 
but why visit my blogs, read it and then post your comments with the thinking and anticipation that it would force me to be reactive in a manner intolerant to you. heck i could ban you reading my blog if i want to, but no thanks. your thoughts like the others are most welcome and truly deserving of being read. it contributes to an engaging discussions if there are. otherwise, you thoughts deserve to be respected by all means. 
what if i brag a lot? does it diminish you as a person? does it take away from you something that's too valuable? does it make me a better person than you are? none of those! i repeat none of those because no one can take anything away from us and no one could be a lesser person than us. yes inspite of my braggadocio, i am not a better person than anyone. but i am still a person just like anyone else who could find comforts in being conceited, arrogant and obnoxious.
no. the measure of a man is not how he brags about himself. not even in the manner he shares or blogs the way he lives his life and not even in the manner by which he is thankful of all the blessings he has in life.
to each his own and everyone is measured differently. there is no constant in all of us. each is uniquely different and have every right to present himself the way he likes or to live the life the way he does.
but anyway you had me blogging out of respect to your comments to one of my blogs. you truly deserve my tolerance. again i bow to you! if you wish too, i would genuflect to make you feel much better and then triumphant.
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23
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what could have been?
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Aug 12, 2009 8:28 pm
977 Views
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"but then again, when ur all alone after everyone else has already left ur house, and ur sitting in ur favorite armchair, having coffee and reminiscing, there will be a fleeting moment where u will realize in retrospect, the WHAT IFs and the WHAT COULD HAVE BEENs and there's nothing much u can do abt it except to heave a sigh, and WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING U COULD'VE DONE..." Pamela1962
my take:
what purpose does it serve to put our thoughts on what could have been?
what do we mean by what could have been? hmm i think it something we sort of retrospect and wishes that if only we have done that or those, then our lives would be different now - more profound and meaningful. perhaps richer too and living in abundance. less pain i supposed. how about powerful more than being respectable?
spending even just a minute on thinking of the things that we wish we could have done differently is just utterly absurd. heck life is absurd anyway, so why not go for it and wish for the things, events or situations that could have been.
personally, i have no time for retrospecting of what could have been. maybe i am just too appreciative of the way my life has turned out and unraveled. or i just have that great capacity to live a life that is meant to live - with no yearning for something that could have been.
if i did not do it then, would it really matter now? not in any scheme of things and no matter how compelling our yearning for the what could have been, the reality is it will not change anything.
perhaps for others, what could have been its a way of living a dream or a nightmare. but those things are in the past and forever unchangeable or restorable. most things that are done can not be undone and so is this what could have been?
if i flirted with her and i didn't profess love or pursue her, would it change anything if sometime in the future i thought about of what could have been? if i flirted with her, it has no other meaning but flirting.
what could have been is regretting. but why would i regret or even reject anything that's been a part of my life. i may not remember the agonies, disappointments and setbacks; but i will certainly relish the splendor and glory of my past.
perhaps conceited men has that great capacity to be forwarded looking and just accept the things that has been.
when we think of what could have been, we yearn for something more different than the life we have now. perhaps there is less agony if only we have more courage to profess that love or was persistent in asking in her or him out. but do we really know or would we know that we are better off if we have done those things that would be a sort of answer to our question of what could have been.
in my old age and even when i am sickly and senile, i will reminisce the good things and be thankful of the many blessings i have and will never venture of thinking about what could have been.
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10
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settle for imperfections!
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Aug 7, 2009 7:50 am
985 Views
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reposting my blog for the benefit of those who are still looking for a perfect bf, gf or relationship. in all my conceitedness, i am not into a pursuit of perfection. i may be elusive, but not because i am in search of perfection. is just that she has not found me yet - she has to love me for my imperfections.
Oct 2, 2008 8:29 pm
442 Views
sometime we are asking way too much and we are hard on ourselves. how many times we read a blog yearning for relationship, not only just a relationship, but a perfect relationship. then we say at the end of the day, it does feel empty without someone special.
i say let's not focus on what makes us empty. instead focus on the things that makes us full. be appreciative of what we got. for the most part, our ability to blog here and share our thoughts are testimonial that we have been blessed. by certain measure it should make us not feel empty, instead be appreciated of what we got. even a saddest relationship experience or our heart being broken many times is a thing of beauty. sometimes it does make us resilient and ready even for a perfect storm thrown on us.
love? we put so much energy in our pursuit or yearning of love - of the course the love of a person that we thought would complete us. but we can love ourselves and others that around us without expecting to be loved in return. or we can love a certain pursuit or just the pursuit of happiness not dependent on a woman or a man. then we yearn to settle, but not just to settle but to settle for or with the best.
we should not settle, instead we should accept the things that are offered and given. imperfections is around us, so if we ever have to settle, we must settle for imperfections and accept things the way they are. if we always yearn to settle only for the best, then we are always pre-occupied by that thought and then before we know it, its too late to settle for what matters most - happiness that are only real and within our grasp.
special someone? what if he or she never come? dont we ever know how to live a life without even having someone so special? i thought for a woman, the most special someone is a child or having a child. its the fulfilling achievement that a woman can ever have, forever she will be a mother. we can't totally rely on the relationship of a man or a woman. sometimes they dont last forever. but a child's love is forever.
i am blessed in many ways, including the love of my children and two grandchildren. that's indeed is priceless!
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5
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a plea for help!
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Aug 6, 2009 12:01 pm
2416 Views
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yes i am pleading for help. not for me but for her so she may find the courage to tell me that she likes me or loves me.
yes you have been reading my blogs from the beginning and you told me that you are truly mesmerized by my steadfast conceitedness. and yet somehow you seems to believe that its all a charade, that by all means i am not the person i seemed to portray in my blogs. if not for my conceitedness you said, you thought i am great person to be had. and then to love.
maybe not. but how one would detached himself from his writings? would it be possible that one can write and only write with pretensions.
others thought the my blogging is just an expression of my other persona, that this is but an alter ego and deep inside i am by all measures and in reality not a conceited person.
if you like me, why would my blogging hinders you from expressing that love. go ahead and express it with gusto! who knows i may find liking you too.
please tell her or encourage her that i have the capacity to be good and endearing inspite of my blogs. would that be believable or a sham?
a plea for help! really? or this is just one of those things that i had done or wrote to just piss you off. hmm how silly i am indeed?
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105
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in defense of expectations!
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Aug 3, 2009 8:58 pm
1053 Views
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"it's ridiculous how most people think they have the right to expect anything from other people...how they expect them to be strong, to be pretty, to be smart, to be compassionate, subversive, caring, accepting...the list goes on. it is just plainly immature how acceptance is dependent on other people meeting these expectations, or standards.
such is man's self-aggrandization...for them to indulge in such is preposterous. what right has any man to have standards and expectations, when they fall short themselves. this is a fact. man is not perfect. and the sooner he stops thinking that the world revolves around him, the greater are his chances of witnessing and experiencing the real world." kindayana maharan
my take:
the imperfections of all of us is that we have preferences and standards. others are lofty and others are simpler. such is really the truth and no wise men or philosophers could ever change that fact. not even the righteousness of your words.
the only way to be detached to such absurdities of our lives is to parted with our lives, by then what choices or preferences do we have. would it matter then? go ahead and take pleasure in ridiculing the imperfections of men. but that's how far you can go and you can never change a thing. and even yourself at this juncture had exercised that preferences or standards of ridiculing the right of us to expect from others.
no one is ever immune from expectations. you could expect a lot or you could expect less. nevertheless its still expectations.
to rationalize and even to moralize that man's self-aggrandizement as preposterous is akin to putting us in a pedestal as if we can do no wrong. i am no saint and i always do wrong. but you can never take away anyone's preferences nor their standards because no one is absolutely perfect or infallible.
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5
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should i ask her?
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Aug 3, 2009 7:13 am
1207 Views
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i really have this with women. no. she doesn't have to be stunningly great looking or gorgeous. but she has to have an aura of confidence, arrogance and sophistication.
what really makes me attractive to someone is the way they carry themselves and specially the way they dress. one can just be decent looking, but if i can make her sport an added sophistication, she is more than beautiful.
no! she doesn't have to be in that corporate attire. she could be just in an ordinary dress but she is transcendental in the manner i look at her or adore her. remember that movie "pretty woman" where julia roberts was transformed into sophistication. i like her to be like that.
so would you mind if i ask you if you are willing to have a make over if you become my woman - make over in your mannerism and the way you dress up. including looks too if you could. no. not altering your face surgically. just going to the parlor and have a different look or make over.
by the way, what really turns me on with a woman is her intelligence. that outer appearance sophistication will not cut it by itself. how many women have i dumped because they could not engage intellectually or write.
yeah i remember she wrote me after i left singapore. gosh she was trying hard and it turned me off. the same with my gf in italy when she wrote me after i left italy. they have no coherence in their thoughts and i was really dismayed.
am i wrong to have my woman the way i like her to be? why cant i just like her the way she is - lovingly me faithfully in her heart? why would sophistication matter?
what had became of me yearning for my woman to be like that? i am just an ordinary guy from a province in bicol. born and reared poor.
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24
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how could i be totally yours?
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Aug 2, 2009 12:19 am
949 Views
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even if you find me and then i found loving you, i could not be totally yours. its perhaps the very reason why i am very ambivalent about loving someone or pursuing someone no matter how initially i would like her or you.
how could i be totally yours? i am father and a grandad. you are just going to be torned by my love and my affection to my two daughters and two grandaughters.
so how would you propose to sort out this problem if you really like me and then love me?
sometimes it easy to say that it would not be a problem. however the hard reality is, sometimes what you said or promised are differently done or are ignored when the relationship is consummated by marriage or living together.
so how would you propose to sort out this problem if you really like me and then love me?
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3
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i just can't bring myself!
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Aug 1, 2009 9:50 am
990 Views
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yeah i just can't bring myself! no its not about asking you ask out for a date or professing that i like you or that there is something in you that makes me - intensely attracted to you that perhaps that if i don't ask you out, i totally loss out! 
its about earning a decent bucks on a saturday OT and delivering on a promise.
last thursday i didnt go to work and pretended that i have a dental appointment, with my boss showing such bossy displeasure by commenting that i should take care of my appointments on the every other friday that i am off. yes i work 9 hours a day with off every other friday. no i dont work 9 hours, i show up for work 9 hours. but on the productive count, i would say only 6 to 7 hours. what a job ha? but its a typical government job!
out of the blue i said, ok i will make it up to you and i will do OT this saturday. but now here i am blogging instead of being at work. i really can't bring myself to work doing OT on a saturday although the hourly is almost earning like a nurse of $57. its not worthed i think.
i think the time spent on oneself on a weekend even by just not doing anything is more priceless than earning that money. at my age, rest is a necessary ingredient of healthy living and prolonging life. and then keeping me young in looks and in spirit!
besides i am getting by anyway and there is no need to earn that extra money, and then for what? i am sure such money will be only spent on extravagant things because i have this attitude that's not my money anyway and its the agency's money, and all i have to do is show up and work.
about not delivering on my promise, who cares? he needs me more than i need him. i am the worker and he is the boss and so he is at my mercy. i can produce less, about right or more depending on his attitude.
how about his recommendations for promotions or awards? hmm i dont need that. who wants to have the stress of management anyway when i can get by or more with what i earned as a techincian. besides i earned more than he is if we combined my pension from the navy.
there is a point in one's life that one must settle for less to have more. yes i can make more money but then less time for myself. more money and then more aggravation to myself.
to coin a phrase, "ITS NOT money STUPID, ITS ABOUT LIVING A LIFE!"
you see i am really not that person so focus on money, career and ambition. if i was, i should be rich by now. but certainly i would missed out too on many experiences in life as the opportunity cost on focusing on earning that money and becoming rich. i have been blessed in many ways and i very thankful for that. my million thanks to HIM!
hope everyone is having a great weekend!
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To link to this blog (younglooking55) use [blog younglooking55] in your messages.
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