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this woman in tink

...this is my heart
...this is my soul
this is me

the anger within
Posted:Jun 20, 2017 4:55 pm
Last Updated:Jul 10, 2017 2:13 am

i have noticed i react with anger a lot of times. i know i got most of that anger from my parents who do the same thing over and over i tried to release it and let it go but then it comes back over and over. so i realized i was not acknowledging it is there i do recognize it is there but i ignore it thinking it will go away. wrong move i was made to realize i had to acknowledge it, thank it for the lesson it is teaching me and embrace it with the love and light that is so much bigger than the fear within me.
i love you my anger, my fear i hug you with the huge amount of light and humongous love also within me. and i allow you to be in me for as long as you want to. most in your lifethank you
love and light everyone
what is it you fear

new me
Posted:Jun 11, 2017 10:13 am
Last Updated:Jul 1, 2017 11:05 am

i am love
i am light
i am everyone, everywhere
spirit that i am
Posted:Jan 8, 2017 6:44 pm
Last Updated:Jan 26, 2017 4:57 pm

oftentimes i have something in mind to write about. i never write it down so in time i forget so maybe i am getting oldl
past few days been on the ow end of the cycle again and when i say low i am cranky and on the negative sdide of things. i try to just go with the flow and live the moment. and i never forget to pray to hold me up and bring me back up and i wonder if this cycle would end. am i doing anything not right? am i not doing anything?
and past week been on and off again passing out in hypoglycemias same questions. am i not doing anything? am i not doing something right? am i hard headed? do i need help?
and again i ask myself, what is still my use in this earth. i have no job. i am dependent on my parents. and yes my mom can get angry with me and question me, it is the only responsibility i have, to take care of me, what am i doing?
and again i ask what is the reason for the hypos? is it for me? is it for my sons? am sure it is not for my parents
still i find no reason or is my eyes closed? still i try to look at the positive side of it knowing there is always a reason.
hot lucifer
Posted:Sep 12, 2016 11:00 pm
Last Updated:Jan 8, 2017 6:44 pm

prince of darkness decides to take a vacation and where else would he choose but in the midst of wine , women and song...in LA
Well I always thought i had a dark side... even lusting for one... the prince of darkness himself. Funny, deliciously good looking in his stubbles and just candidly ignorant of his capacity for immortalily when he falls...for the mistakes that mortals makes which he longs to punish
An open letter to my sons
Posted:Aug 23, 2016 7:37 pm
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2016 9:39 pm
Oftentimes in a state of hypoglycemia, i find myself wondering of our mortality. We never know when life will be drawn out from each one of us Always i pray to god above that i be taken when my sons are ready to let go of me. As for me, i request i be taken when i have seen my grandkids But hey we never really know when.
I may not have anything in my name to endow or prepare my sons for a life without their mom. I can only promise wherever i will be in the afterlife, i will watch over them, guide them to their dreams. Maybe i never said i love you enough but i will remind you when you forget. I will touch your heart so you remember. I Love You, to eternity and back And i will miss your hugs, and smile to myself when i remember you cared for me in my weaknesses. You never cease to make me smile even in anger.
love you to eternity and back,
Your mom, Cristina

shy poet
Posted:Jun 27, 2016 6:04 pm
Last Updated:Jul 19, 2016 12:10 am

Every now and then i find in my email inbox simple verses from a long time admirer from the same site. suggested he write a blog, says his are hust simple thoughts. Times simple is just what we need in a complicated world.


I search in the night
When the moon
is bright

Tis you that I seek
Thru the windows
I peek

Your curtains are wide
i see you

you are looking nice
on the glass I
once then

Kisses tossed

Kisses tossed into the air
hoping for trade winds
fast and fair

To carry them to your
lips so fine
tasty as a
summer wine

From mine to thine
with passion

Hope they get there
within a

softly softly as your sigh
soft as the look
thats in your eyes

watching the wiggle
of your hips
remembering the taste
of your lips

dont you think
thats roman-tick
paying it forward
Posted:Jun 22, 2016 9:51 pm
Last Updated:Jun 25, 2016 1:52 am

i have been saying it over and over again. pay it forver. shouting it out to everyone. blessings come pouring in when you share the love, share the blessings, share whatever you have in your hands and have faith the lord will shwer you more.

met with one autism grandma at a mall and got to talking about parents of pwas(people with autism) who refuse to learn thereby giving up on their children. it pains me to hear of pwas being ignored primarily by their parents. and i always say again over and over, educate the parents first then you empower them. but if they refuse to listen, i guess it is time to move on to another parent who will listen and learn for her child. they are very intelligent kids. just give them a chance to shine. and i pay it forward to parents who will listen. parents who trust their children will live an independent life, find their place in the son.
and agin i advocate to everyone to allow them to shine.

my charlie
Posted:May 21, 2016 7:29 pm
Last Updated:Jun 17, 2016 1:12 am

Heya Hon...
I loved our chat n funs this moanin!
You're such a delightful little nymph.. I love you! Small in size but oh so large a personality! You are as I always knew you would be! A dominating nature, a leader but also a woman who needs a man to dominate but not stifle, her.
You could never settle for less in a man and if you ever did, it would not last. Your man must earn your respect and keep it. And he must achieve this with his physical, emotional and spiritual prowess. He must always stand tall before you as a leader but be ready to kneel and bend before you as your willing and able servant and protector. With you my love, I gladly bend over both figuratively and literally.
In a man you must have the attraction of physical beauty but are only truly captured by his intellectual cordage. You may love the tongue of quick silvered Hermes but you need need a man of Haphaestus' strength and dignity adjunct with Apollonian intellect.
As time goes on my Love, you will discover me to be a man of great depth. I am not a braggart but my range of experience and wordly knowledge comes from my years of travel. I have worn many hats and have many stories, all true. I am a jewel of many facets; a reader of Ovid who delights in Clemens, complicatedly simple, aho!
I will continue to be the god who stands tall in front of you and you will be the goddess who kneels before me, not in subordination but in mutual respect and admiration.
Posted:May 5, 2016 6:38 pm
Last Updated:May 14, 2016 4:21 pm

[SIZE 2]Driver did not come today so i told my sons to take a tricycle to school. I have taught them how to ride a jeep and the tricycle in case no one can pick them up or take them anywhere in town. Gave to one of the boys their pamasahe, their lola added let Ate (the househelp0 go with you. Isaid no. As she was talking she took the pamasahe from the boys and said go and give it to the driver yourself or they might lose it. By this time I know fear was again creeping into my mom's head. I tolf the househelp, no then took the pamasahe and gave it back to my boy and off they went.
Ofrentime i see fear in people's hearts. Fear of the unknown and fear of something that is not even there. All the more i see it in the society where I have two young boys with autism.
As the president of the Autism society in my local chapter i have seen how people react to my kids. There was a time when I let them line up when they order from fastfood. Oftentimes the guy/gal on the counter looks to me and starts talking to me. So i tell them talk to him, am not the one ordering.
In school, i asked the teachers to please erase the label from their minds. Think of what they can do and not what they cannot do.
Once i was talking to the mayor regarding a program for kids like my sons and asked if we can get older kids, employable age in the mall/grocery she owns !' for exposure to show people they can work 2. exposure for these kids too, and the confidence that they can do it. And the mayor says, i didn't know they can work. that was just the first step into educating the mayor.
I believe it is gonna take a long time before my society can accept piople with autism in the mainstream. It is the battlecry of Autism Society, Phukiooibnes - Autism A Ok..
letting go
Posted:Apr 28, 2016 5:28 pm
Last Updated:May 26, 2016 5:36 pm

i can only hold your hand and his
as i watch you and him in pain
he has said his goodbye
but you, i know can never let go
it is never easy
you can only hold on to the happy thoughts
and let the pain fade in time
i will be holding your hand until you tell me to let go
allow him to go
and i know he will go where he needs to

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