this is me Sep 10, 2009 6:48 pm Mood: mellow, 1185 Views I laughed, I cried. I believed, I lied. I fought, I won. I lost, I gained. I loved, I hated. I left, I returned. I risked, I got burned. I took, I gave. I wasted, I saved. I held on, I let go. I flew high, I fell down low. I created, I destroyed. I listened, I was heard. I hurt, I healed. But most of all, I LIVED. 16 Comments

What would it take to fall in love again? Nov 21, 2009 3:19 am Mood: hopeful, 69 Views Contrary to what most of my friends think, I DO want to fall in love again. I AM looking for the real thing. Work is NOT the be-all and end-all for me. Part of what they say is true, though. I'm scared of making another wrong choice and getting badly hurt again. There's no use denying that - the people who know me well can still see the scars. Of course Im scared. But I also realize that, like , everything else, loving has its risks, as well as rewards. And the rewards make the risks worth taking . So why haven't I fallen in love again yet? It's been more than a year since my last relationship and I haven't even gone on any serious getting-to-know-a-potential-partner dates yet. To be honest, I haven't really exerted any effort to be in one, because I thought that one shouldn't have to work so hard to find "The One" or for a relationship to start. I believe that if something is meant to happen, it will, regardless of the odds. I guess I'm a sucker for all that destiny crap, after all . So what, then, would it take for me to fall in love again? I think it would be the combination of the right timing, right circumstances, and of course, the right person. All I need is a little more patience... 6 Comments

VOICELESS... Nov 19, 2009 2:17 am Mood: stressed, 97 Views ... But never Speechless! Hehe My health is starting to suffer from all the late nights and the full-speed working pace I really love what I do, and I want to keep on going, but my body is telling me to put on the brakes. I guess I have to. It would be quite difficult for me to do my job when my voice went AWOL Oh well... It's a classic case of the mind being willing, but the body is not 10 Comments

Happiness comes in small packages Nov 17, 2009 5:48 pm Mood: happy, 85 Views I was so tired when I got home last night that I went straight to my room to rest. I didn't linger in the living room to play with my 4-yr old niece and 1-yr old nephew like I usually do. A few minutes later, there was a banging at my door, followed by my nephew's voice hollering "Ta! Ta!" (short for Tita or Aunt). I opened the door and he came barging in . He went straight to my bed which was just a few inches off the floor. I picked him up then played a videoke CD 'cause I knew the boy loved music and I was hoping it will keep him still. True enough, he just watched me intently while humming along every few seconds or so. By the third song, he yawned widely then put his sleepy head on my shoulder. Before the song was over, he was fast asleep! Haha. It was so nice. Though my arms ached from carrying him for so long, I still felt my fatigue drain away... 4 Comments

Sleepless Nov 16, 2009 6:10 pm Mood: cranky, 128 Views I hate the feeling of wanting to sleep AND having the time to, but COULDN'T... Aaarrrgggghhh! I guess that's the downside to being uber busy - it's not easy for the brain to relax when it's time to. It just keeps on working against your will, going through the things still waiting to be done, knowing that it doesn't have time to finish them all within the required time frame. Of course, it doesn't help that the working environment isn't that healthy to begin with. The upside, though, is that I dont have time to be lonely, or to ponder on the fact that I don't have anyone to watch a movie with, or to mope around and bemoan my "singleness" this Christmas. Hehe. I'd gladly go through more sleepless nights for that! 7 Comments

time flies Nov 14, 2009 2:47 am Mood: mellow, 139 Views and it's almost Christmas already... again! I could almost smell the Christmas-y scent in the air. My wallet and credit card, most especially, are feeling the pressure - we're not ready for Christmas yet! A friend and I were talking yesterday about how Christmas feels like to different people. The religious believe it's a time to thank God for their blessings and for the gift of forgiveness. The employed look forward to it because of the 13th month pay and bonuses they're expecting to receive. The poor are probably feeling the disparity between themselves and "others" all the more. And what of those lucky few who have everything they could want and more? They are probably wishing that things would remain the same... 6 Comments

When is a hit A HIT? Nov 13, 2009 6:17 am Mood: curious, 147 Views There's this guy I met a couple of weeks ago - his boss and mine are business partners (in another venture outside our company). I was asked to help our sales agent with an account that he was also handling, so we were introduced. We already knew each other by name, since our sales agent has mentioned the other before, and we have exchanged emails about business concerns where our jobs/companies overlapped, but that was the first time we actually met. He was very friendly and outgoing, a typical extrovert, which instantly made me feel at ease in his company. After the first meeting, though, his body language shifted from businesslike and professional to a little bit more personal. A bit flirty, even. Like when he'd say something, he'd lean over close enough for me to smell his nice perfume . Or how he'd tap me lightly on the arm or shoulder when he wants to call my attention, instead of simply saying my name. Or how he'd stare at me a little too intently while we're talking. And lately, it got beyond just body language. He has called me practically every other day for the past few days, for inconsequential reasons - like asking how my meeting with another client went, or ask how my event was. He's also exerting extra effort to open a new account for my product, and updates me about it thru SMS every once in a while, when it should have been coursed through our sales agent since it's sales related. Besides, he never exerted that much effort for the sales agent before . Then when I thank him, he'd say things like "malakas ka sa kin eh" or "basta ikaw", which, to me, are typical flirty lines. It's getting flattering, really. I probably would have been pulled into his web if I didnt know any better. Because the thing is, I think he's married. I saw two rings on his left hand, both on the ring finger. I cant confirm it, though, as I cant very well ask him about it - it would tell him Im interested and I dont want to give him those kinds of signals. And of course, I cant ask my boss He's good at this, though. He does everything so subtly that one can never be sure of his intentions. His actions can be interpreted whichever way he wants it to be, in case anyone should ask. If he was really single and interested, then he can admit that he was interested in me. If he was married, though, then he can say that he was only being friendly and ma-PR. Anyhow, Im curious about those two rings, though. Do guys get engagement rings too? 5 Comments

Point of view Nov 11, 2009 4:10 am Mood: rejuvenated, 197 Views Read this somewhere before... I dont know why, but it suddenly popped in my mind again just now... "WHAT THE CATTERPILLAR CALLS THE END OF THE WORLD, THE MASTER CALLS A BUTTERFLY" 5 Comments

the sound of music Nov 10, 2009 11:54 pm Mood: grateful, 198 Views In times like these, Im really thankful to the great composers, musicians, and artists for creating the kind of music that they do - one that would fit any mood that Im in. There's music for when - Im happy - Im drained - Im stressed - Im depressed - Im sober - Im lonely - I cant sleep - Im sleepy - I want to celebrate - I need inspiration - Im inspired - I feel loved - Im cranky - I want to lash out at somebody - I cant express myself - I dont even know exactly how I feel 6 Comments

bombshells and land mines Nov 10, 2009 3:09 am Mood: drained, 214 Views I hate being sent in to a meeting without getting the whole behind-the-scenes story. But when you're a mere employee, you have to do a lot of things that you hate doing When you don't know what's coming, it's a little difficult to prepare your defense. So you get hit full on the face. I feel so tired and drained... 4 Comments

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