7 common characteristics of people who are lucky in love
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Posted:Jun 30, 2009 7:19 am
Last Updated:Jul 14, 2009 5:13 am 6542 Views
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1. They assume responsibility for their love life.
Those who succeed in love realize they are in control of all aspects of their life, love life included. They don’t waste time and energy blaming someone else for their misery or playing the victim role. They admit they made poor choices in dating and don’t blame parents, past mates, and life in general for those mistakes. Then they learn from those mistakes and move on.
This can be frightening for some people, but it is actually quite empowering. No more excuses, you are the boss of your life and you have the ability to create the reality you want!
What is the main cause for where your love life is at? What could you have done differently? Were there people you should have passed on or people you should have gone out with that you didn’t? Were there relationships you should have gotten out of sooner?
2.They are optimistic.
They realize they may have to kiss a few frogs to get their prince, but at the end of the day they know their perfect mate will come. They also find a way to enjoy the journey while they wait.
3. They have self-confidence.
People who succeed in love have loads of self-esteem that prevents them from entering bad dating patters. They know they deserve someone who is perfect for them and don’t settle for less. If your confidence is lacking, a bad relationship will only make it worse and send you into a downward spiral. When a relationship doesn’t work out you need to take responsibility for your part, recognize the other person’s faults, learn, and move on. You shouldn’t go into self-defeating mode and start dating losers. If your confidence is at a good level you will be able to look at the situation logically and have a foundation to fall back on.
4. They Don’t Complain.
Your thoughts and words have very powerful energy and can make or break your success. Don’t complain about exes or your dating life. Watch every thought and word for a month and see if you don’t start getting better results.
5. They take action.
Successful people know to achieve what they want they need to do more than just talk. They put themselves out there and learn more. If they aren’t where they want to be yet they know it’s simply because there is something they haven’t done or tried yet. Then, they starting learning and doing. If you want to be in a different situation then you have to make some changes to your life. I get complaints from women all the time that they aren’t meeting the men they want. Then after questioning them I find out they haven’t tried any new strategies in years. If you want different fruits, you have to change the roots, so shake it up and think outside the box.
6. They don’t let their egos get in the way.
People who are successful in love don’t let their egos get in the way of having a great love life. If you are constantly afraid of rejection or embarrassed to get help you are likely to stay in the same place for a long time. Don’t be afraid to read dating advice articles and books, hire a matchmaker, or get help from a dating coach. Also don’t be embarrassed to tell people you meet that you want to settle down; one of the best ways to meet a great person is through mutual acquaintances. There is no shame in seeking help; there is only shame in staying stuck and not doing what it takes to get out of a rut!
7. They know when to walk.
Those who are most successful in love will often jump before the ship sinks. To some this may seem like giving up too soon, but it’s important to know when enough is enough. In dating there is obviously an amount of compromise and work involved to keep the relationship in a good place, but knowing when to bail is crucial. Don’t let past plans and dreams for the future cloud your judgment about a healthy relationship. The relationship needs to be working for you in the present and moving forward and if it’s not it could simply be time to move on. You can have new dreams and future plans with someone else who is on the same track as you. We all know that when one door closes at least one more opens, but if you are starting at the shut door you may not even see the open door across the hall. If you keep a relationship past its expiration date you could be missing out on the opportunity to get someone even more perfect for you!
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reasons women cheat
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Posted:Jun 24, 2008 2:07 am
Last Updated:May 21, 2009 10:01 pm 6896 Views
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Number 10
Not enough sex
Remember the good old days when you could stay up forever fooling around? Then responsibility entered the mix -- and -- and before you knew it, sleep was more important than sex. Well, women want to feel wanted. If you’re not making her feel
that way, she could seek it elsewhere. To keep that spark alive, ask her out on date nights, send her provocative e-mails at lunch, and by all
means, don’t let life get in the way of kissing, cuddling and sex.
Number 9
Being the bad girl
Just as men feel the urge to sow their wild oats,
some women have an inner sex kitten just waiting to be unleashed -- and when the beast escapes from the cage, look out. This frisky behavior usually rears its ugly head in response to some sort of life change -- major weight loss, new job, new friends, mid-life crisis, etc. Keep the lines of communication open and she’ll be more likely to talk to you about what’s going on instead of spilling her guts to a stranger in the night.
Number 8
Self-esteem
Sex can be an instant pick-me-up; a self-esteem booster that makes women feel sexier, more beautiful and more loved. If your wife or girlfriend has self-esteem issues, it doesn’t mean she’s automatically going to cheat -- and it’s certainly not your fault if she does -- but there are ways to make her feel secure in the relationship that could help her from straying. Pay attention to her, ask her questions and don’t hold back on compliments -- a little flattery goes a long way with women.
Number 7
Revenge/payback for past wrongs
No, you didn’t cheat, but whether you blew your retirement fund in Vegas or got caught in a big lie, you did break her trust (and, possibly, her heart). She feels wounded and betrayed -- and wants to hurt you the same way you hurt her. To regain her trust, it’s not enough just to tell her you’re sorry; you have to show her. Actions speak louder than words.
Number 6
Lack of intimacy
You have it all: the house, the two-car garage and the two-and-a-half bathrooms -- at least on the outside. But inside, the relationship is lacking the one thing women want most: intimacy. It’s not just sex that makes women feel connected in a relationship; it’s touching, kissing, cuddling, and communicating. Women crave it, and she could seek it elsewhere if she’s not getting it at home. To improve intimacy, spend quality time together, give her a foot massage, make a romantic dinner for two -- anything that will give her a sense of unity and closeness.
Number 5
Feeling neglected/ignored/underappreciated
Women wear many hats in a relationship -- housekeeper, errand-runner, grocery shopper, babysitter, etc. When she feels more like a maid than a girlfriend/wife, that’s when she could stray. The fact that you spend all your time at work or on the golf course gives her double reason to seek attention elsewhere. No, you can’t quit your job, but you can thank her for all her selfless deeds -- and do your share around the house.
Number 4
Your emotional withdrawal
Women are emotional beings. Not only do they need physical support, but they also need emotional support. Once you retreat from the relationship, she sees it as a sign that things are through -- a breakup is inevitable. So, she’s not really cheating, she’s moving on. To avoid this, be present in the relationship. Yes, that means sharing your icky feelings, but it’s better than the alternative, right?
Number 3
Bedroom boredom
Sex can become monotonous if you let it -- the same position; the same setting; the same person. An affair adds adventure and gets her adrenalin flowing. To avoid routine, avoid repetition. Sweep her away for the weekend, make out at the movies, kiss her for no reason at all... The unexpected adds excitement.
Number 2
Exit strategy
Instead of breaking up with you, she cheats on you. That way she doesn’t have to deal with the broken relationship, which is much harder to fix. An affair is the easy way out -- or at least that’s how she sees it. That’s another reason communication is key. Let her know that she can talk to you about anything and that you love her enough to work through any bumps in the relationship road.
Number 1
Revenge for your cheating
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Because you cheated, she wants to get back at you and give you a dose of your own medicine. Cheating is her vengeance, her chance to even the playing field. No, you can’t undo your indiscretion, but you can ask for her forgiveness, assure her it will never happen again and suggest couples therapy to help you get through this tough time.
When you add up all the reasons women cheat, it’s usually her heart (or her ego) that needs healing, not her libido. Keep the lines of communication open, be supportive and encouraging and work at keeping that spark ignited. In other words: Don’t give her a reason to stray.
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signs she's cheating on you
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Posted:Jun 24, 2008 2:03 am
Last Updated:May 21, 2009 10:01 pm 7480 Views
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Number 10
She detaches herself from your family
The fact that she no longer wants to attend your family's functions or hang with your friends is one of our signs she's cheating on you. This sign may be indicative of cheater's remorse on her part, which means that she likely feels guilty about cheating. The less she immerses herself in your circles (which contain people who are painful reminders of her sins), the less mental anguish she'll have to endure.
Number 9
She nags you incessantly
Gone are the days when the two of you could communicate with harmonious precision. Now, every sentiment you express sets her off and she finds any excuse to lash out at you.
If such an about-face sounds familiar, she may be subconsciously trying to justify her little tryst. Nagging you helps eliminate or at least ease her nagging guilt. So if she habitually begins to point out your every flaw, you may want to get to the bottom of what's really going on because it's one of our signs she's cheating on you.
Number 8
She has a mysterious friend
A telltale sign that your woman is cheating arises when a mysterious friend inches his way into the picture. Whether it's someone she claims is a coworker or an old friend from way back, she keeps this friendship under wraps and is hesitant to share any general details about him, much less introduce you. And it doesn't take a Ph.D. to figure out why.
Number 7
She deflects simple questions
You should be suspicious of your girlfriend when she refuses to answer the simplest and fairest of questions or answers questions only after repeating them back to you, which usually indicates a mind that's searching for a lie. Be wary of times when, rather than reveal that she got home at midnight, she begrudgingly asks, "Why do you want to know what time I left the coffee shop?" If she gets defensive about disclosing information that she used to volunteer without hesitation, she may be hiding something or someone and it's one of the surest sings she's cheating on you.
Number 6
She shifts priorities away from you
If she is involved in a hot and heavy romance with someone else, you'll definitely feel a shift in her daily priorities. Suddenly, there are no more implied Sunday dates at the movies or something always comes up on dance-lesson Thursday. There is a tendency for most philanderers to schedule meetings with their new flame as often as they can, which results in a complete disregard for previous engagements.
Number 5
She puts more effort into looking sexy
You may like her just the way she is, but that won't stop her from trying to dazzle her new fling. Just as you tried to impress each other at the beginning of your relationship, she'll try to impress her new flame with a sudden urge to improve her style, change her makeup and alter her physical appearance for the new man in her life. So, while her desire to look sexier is one thing, not caring about your opinion on the matter is quite another.
Number 4
She becomes autonomous
One of the biggest signs she's cheating on you is her breaking away from your little two-person unit to become more autonomous. She has dropped "we" from her vocabulary in favor of "I." Moreover, she does more things on her own and stops consulting you about future plans. In short, she conducts herself in ways that hint that she no longer needs you to hold her hand. Whether she's hoping you'll leave her or she's simply looking for more time to lead her "double life," it's safe to conclude that she wants you out of the picture -- she just can't build up the nerve to leave you.
Number 3
She has no interest in sex with you
When your relationship was new, the two of your were full of passion and open to spontaneous lovemaking. Now it's all a bit iffy, whereby you're rarely hitting the sheets and you're only doing so if and when she feels like it.
On a slightly more ego-bashing note, she may suddenly become bored by your performance and appear to be thinking about someone else when you do make love. Cheating may be wrong, but you can't deny that unlawful sex is usually more exhilarating. So, if you can no longer satisfy her sexually, someone else may be rubbing her the right way.
Number 2
She's secretive about her schedule
She may claim to no longer have time for any extracurricular activities with you, yet she has one foot out the door the minute one of her girlfriends calls. Either that or she has been "going away on business" one too many times. And when she does leave, her whereabouts are sketchy at best and you are somehow always the last to know.
Disclosing her itinerary to you at the last minute and overlooking your plans in the process can mean many things, one of which isn't that she's forgetting, but rather leaving you out.
Number 1
You become irrelevant
What could be worse than a girlfriend who nags you about absolutely everything? How about one who stops noticing that you're even alive? Just as No. 9 on our list of signs she's cheating on you is a possibility (she nags you incessantly), the opposite could be yet another clue of your loves cheating ways.
All at once, she doesn't care if you don't want to go to the ballet with her; she'll just find somebody else with whom to go. And whatever opinion you may have, be it about how she looks or how you're feeling, is met with a tepid response. In other words, she doesn't place the same importance on what you think and what you do as she once did, especially on things that directly affect the relationship.
cheating in check
Don't delude yourself into thinking that your woman would never cheat and don't rush to judgment either; if she is guilty of committing any signs on the list, perhaps it's indicative that something is awry in the relationship . In any case, this is a great opportunity for you to address problems you may not have noticed before scanning this article.
More importantly, don't let what may just be a bad case of jealousy taint your perception of her. Reading her the wrong way or jumping to conclusions can permanently sever a relationship; get all the facts before you confront her.
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thank you
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Posted:Jun 22, 2008 10:17 pm
Last Updated:May 21, 2009 10:01 pm 7053 Views
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to those who are applying to be my dadee ... thank you for your interest but i already have one ... thank you for your e-mails ...
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