It is an attempt to explore, pour my soul, free my spirit and squeeze my heart, to highlight brotherhood of man, and to purify true love, the common human language for all! [/I]
It is Friday, October 12, the first day of what is called in Arabic Eid Al-Fettr. Eid means celebration and Fettr means breakfasting. this means celebrating the end of Ramadan. in All arab and Muslim countries we have a 4 days Holiday. celebrations include visiting families and relatives and friends as well. even if u have not seen someone for long time, on this occasion you have to remember him/her and pay a visit! Using sms messages and emails helped a lot to congratulate people in other countries or unreachable! But it is a MUST for a man to visit his mother, sisters older brothers first then younger ones!
So, I will be busy paying such visits, and might not be on line that often.
I congratulate all Muslims on this occasion, and hopefully will congratulate all christian brothers and sister soon on Christmas! God bless you all. [/SIZE]
It is not true that we can create or compose poem when ever we want, or when ever we are asked to do so, or even when ever we promise to do so! A poem is is piece of my heart, colored with all my feelings. It is an attempt to pour my soul, squeeze my thoughts, and inspire my heart, at the same time, to flame all my senses in order to obtain a complete presence! A poem is not only flowery words! And not a construction of vocabularies and phrases that go into harmony! A poem is another language, even if it was written by the language that same people understand! but still it is a different language that needs special people who can read between the lines! poetic people can even converse poetically where others find it so hard to comprehend and understand! A poem also need a healthy environment where it can be born and raised! reading and commenting a poem can make it grow fast sometimes, but it is should be understood with the right sense, and I honestly don't blame digital people if they avoid the complication of understanding it, because for some, it is just a headache! It can take you 2-3 minutes to create a poem in some occasions! and it might take you the whole life, not being able to compose it, if the environment of its birth is so artificial!
How I wish, I could create the poem, I promised to create! but... but in order to do so, I need to breath.. I need to date myself.... I need to see the rainbow colors as they appear in the sky, not as drawn beautifully by my computer.... I need to touch your spirit... I need to purify your soul... I need to see how beautifully your toes nails are polished.... I need to feel your breath filling my lungs...! I need to be myself, and need to feel you are you...! And I still blame the moon, the only one, that can peak from your window, and knows you are real!
A man can lie to himself in many situations! Sometimes realizing that and sometimes does not!
A man lies to himself when he sees her saying to someone: I can't resist you! and yet, a man say, may be she doesn't mean what she said!
A man lies to himself when he watches her using too many names in order to get a guy for each name she has, and yet, he says to himself, may be she does that in order to know who is fake and who is real! so, why do I bother when i know I know that I am so real!
A man lies to himself when he asks to communicate with her, and yet she claims that she doesn't have the mean of communications that every body can have for free! Yet, he says to himself: May be she is too private! which is good and in my favorite at the end!
these are just some few examples on how a man lies to himself and in many situations, cheat himself, not because he doesn't want to lose her, but he wants to believe his false dream!
Her handle name is Puke_kay, a psycho sex manic pasaway! She keeps following me in chat rooms, and screams! what does she say? "her own words": ( old man sulei I love you) ( Old man Sulei come fuck me) ( old man Sulei i want ur cum) ( I am thirsty for your cum sulei) ...........etc. this is just a little example of her language! she is a 31 years old, that looks desperate, sick, left alone, a street raised creature, worthless thing, what ever u can call it!
The other one is a guy of his 30s too! his handle name is CANTUTANTAY. usually chat in Romance room unless he see me anywhere else he follows. the story of this guy started when he met me first in the Gallery room and offered to show me some pics of naked Filipinos. He said if I'm coming to the phil for a pleasure trip he can bring me all sort of girls that i might be looking for! I just apologized to him in a nice way, but ever since, he is following me to mess the room where i chat! I believe this guy is either was dismissed from an arab country, or tried to get a work visa for some arab countries and was rejected! he is mad at me always for both reasons, first because i am an ARAB, second because i refused his whores deals!
The reason why I am posting this, is because i want other decent people specially the new ones, to know and expect what they might face in FFF. in spite of that, I know, and am very sure that this is only the Rubbish of Filipinos, and every nation has its own rubbish! this doesn't mean and does not neglect the fact, that most of my best friends are filipinos! I only pity the poor mentioned ones, and hope other people wont consider them as examples for the great Filipino nation![/I]
Since I am a regular member and chatter of FFF, I have the chance to blog and read blogs, to comment, to post threads on my groups and also comment, and finally to chat in the in that chatting rooms! it is hardly to pass a day, without hearing or reading about a girl suffering a broken heart! and normally the the heart breaker is an FFF member! Now am not saying that girls don't break guys hearts, they can be as worse as well, in some circumstances, but the difference is that girls are easier to cry and spill it out, rather than guys who just lick their wounds and let their pride be the master of the situation!
Now, the question is, why do people at FFF break each other's hearts?! or, better rephrase it as: why, most long distance relationships fail?
I don't pretend to have the right answer, or the magic solution, but i can together with you, try to put our fingers at the bleeding wound! when we classify the motivations of members to join FFF, we can find out the trends of chatters easier! - Some members join for fun and pure fun. - some members join for serious relationships but they make wrong choices. - some members are serf in the cyberworld because they think they have a bigger chance to find the best girl they are looking for, even if she is at the other end of the world! - some members do the same, but because they failed to get someone locally. - some people are just bored and have nothing to do except surfing, and this lead them to love stories that they did not intend to be involved in, in the first place! - Some girls are looking for a better chance in life, and thus, they want to grab the opportunity, before knowing the other person too well! - some girls do seek some financial help! - some guys run away even they felt true love to their girls, but as soon as they know that their girls are needy! - Since most filipinas are not only jealous type, but possessive in some situations, that might lead to a relationship full of doubts! "NOTHING KILL LOVE MORE THAN DOUBT!"! - Some members are good with all the meaning of the word, but they are not lucky enough!
In conclusion, and for some of the above mentioned reasoned or some other reasons, the relationship fails! and the girl start suffering her broken heart! All I am saying here, that neither the girls or the guys should put themselves in such a situation, unless they meet in person!!! reality is always different! and any of the two parties not willing to make the effort to meet in person, is not a serious one! I can only advise both girls and guys to allow enough time for their relationships to grow normally, taking in consideration all the consequences so that they don't end up with broken hearts! God bless you all!
She's so down today! tearing her soul away! smiling with a teary face... waving with what looks a last glance.. vanishing like a ray!
To her poor spirit, I pray! to her sad heaven I say... mercy can't be baught... how ugly to seek it, when a man has to give it a way!
To her weary heart, I pray... God, fill it with faith! whatever that can be... be her sight... so that she can see you reality! and put off her insanity!
She is so down today! can only pray for her, and again pray! The Almighty God, can ease her heart, and show her the way!
These words are dedicated for my sweet sis, Junlaine!
I always got up like a drunk! not getting enough sleep! I never remember getting enough sleep! Hurry up for meetings....sometimes if in my office even while at least reading posts at the chat room if not posting too! and that meeting is so serious and discussing projects of great lots of money! still I know am not careless or irresponsible! This FFF simply has invaded all aspects of my life! the only things that have priority in my life more than FFF, is my coffee and my cigarette! as long as i am awake my coffee is always in front of me, hot and smelling so great! and my cigarette reminds me of how my life developed! clean...nice..smelling good! then starting to be burn..slow i watch it when half of it is gone! the second half never can compensate the burnt other half! and i don't only watch it burning, but i add to that, to make it burn faster by keeping it squeezed between 2 fingers, and smoked! my selfish cup of coffee knows that it is only encouraging to increase the fire that is burning every thing in my life! what a joy, and what a life!
It took me years and years to realize... lovers years are not ordinary ones! it took me my whole life to sacrifice... lovers sacrifices are scary ones! it took me the future and the past.... to gamble the present you made a sin!
love lives and grows on a compromise... regardless to lose or to win!
I confess that i damned the heart that couldn't carry more love! I confess that i hated the breath that doesn't continue after death... I confess that painted the face of my sky red... i confess that i believed all what was said... i confess that i believed in ur eternity when u even were dead... I confess, without you.. no women any more exist, you were the wine and piece of bread!
scary and dreadful the seconds go by! anyone can imagine, how to wake up in such a lie? sadness and misery! the story of confession! it made the sky look grey and the distance between Truth and the truth is so far way! only God mercy showered the wicked reality... to clean rusty hearts and filthy! for all that, i confess that i was bad... not recognizing your reality! would you confess.... to yourself, not to me... see if you ever related to humanity?!
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not getting enough sleep! I never remember getting enough sleep! Hurry up for meetings....sometimes if in my office even while at least reading posts at the chat room if not posting too! 
the second half never can compensate the burnt other half!
