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| Blogs > Bebong2010 > MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO |
1/9/2011 7:22 am |
i find this very interesting... Three C’s: Cruel, Callous, Counterproductive ]Anyone who has spent time participating in social media has seen their share of bad behavior: name-calling, meanness, and of course there’s spam. Anyone who has a blog – or reads them – has waded through comment sections, tiptoeing around the spurious and vicious remarks, trying to get to the heart of the matter. We shrug it off, we poke through the weeds to get to the flowers, and we tend to dismiss the messages that are buried within words that offend. This is a shame. At times there are nuggets from which we might learn. Nuggets – dare I say it – that we could benefit from considering. We all experience moments when anger or fear get the best of us. We’re human. We feel. But when we communicate through cruelty and callousness, isn’t it all so off-putting that we discount the content of the message itself? Aren’t nasty digs and mocking behaviors counterproductive? The definition of cruel: willfully or knowingly causing pain or distress; enjoying the pain or distress of others The definition of callous: insensitive; indifferent; unsympathetic The definition of counterproductive: thwarting the achievement of an intended goal; tending to defeat one’s purpose What do we teach our children when we observe their cruelty or their indifference? Don’t we admonish them, and deem those behaviors wrong? Moreover, doesn’t virulent delivery obscure the point? I spend a fair amount of time on a diversity of sites. I enjoy them. I learn from them. They also reflect our society in microcosm – with all the good and bad that implies. So let me mention another term, certainly one of the challenges of contemporary culture, and the free-for-all that characterizes our communication style online. The definition of community: the public in general; society; a group of people having cultural, religious, ethnic, or other characteristics in common As for community, we are more than a single group held together by common beliefs; it’s easy to make assumptions about others based on limited (or no) information. It’s equally easy to stereotype – in the real world and the virtual one. But as factions splinter and dissent among themselves, as tempers flare and arguments grow heated or turn nasty, how can we offer opinions constructively if we are cruel or callous? There are times I say things I wish I hadn’t. I try not to, but I’m far from perfect. And so I apologize, hoping to do better in the future. I would propose that we think before we speak, so we may better maintain thriving communities and an exchange of ideas. And I will offer another trio of C’s: courtesy, civility, and consideration.[/B © D A Wolf only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 8:00 am |
Rest assured Ate B, there's always one in every site. Even hon complains about those in gaming sites. Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity. It causes him to describe the beautiful as ugly and the ugly as beautiful, and to confuse the true with the false and the false with the true. ~ Martin Luther King Jr    within each one of us, and let it begin with me (and each one of us)..one breath at a time.
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1/9/2011 10:37 am |
Rest assured Ate B, there's always one in every site. Even hon complains about those in gaming sites. Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity. It causes him to describe the beautiful as ugly and the ugly as beautiful, and to confuse the true with the false and the false with the true. ~ Martin Luther King Jr only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 1:02 pm |
Smiley, Dahlen, I thought about you, and so here I am, quoting you, my dearl..But you changed my nick..I'm ELZ not EBZ...Now, you are trying to combine mine and Bebz..bwahahahahah!  Yeah, you were one of the casualties...But, don't worry, dahlen...It's a wheel of fortune..If yah can see the devil now, he'll take no more leave, because the next time he gets bedridden...that will be IT for him..So, if I were him...REPENT! REPENT! REPENT! Just call me ELZ 
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1/9/2011 1:04 pm |
what's happening??? i saw few profiles had been turned off why??? is it has something to do with what i'm talking about???  Just call me ELZ
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1/9/2011 2:32 pm |
phuck! now i can remember my orig handle...smiley1957 one of the casualties at the height of the last war here while ur in absentia this anal retentive...i guess is miserably bedridden again that's why striking a jerky comeback (well actually an a$$hole originally)...yah know when one is sick? u either desire to be an angel or an evil ...he chose the latter...coz that best fit the personality dahlen as someone in a medical world...u can figure out why people like this one...act this way right???...truly, we can just ignore and move on...i wish! ...coz i got paranoid mahself...me thinks he's the reason why i am invisible despite my gold ball...hates me for being 50 year old forever ..in mah profile, that is i can see him in facebook...a total opposite ...seems sane wanna see??? may i request ebz to please quote me on this one...am afraid i am invi again ...thanks! darling you make me feel guilty by not being here when it happened but here i am at this moment when the second battle is about to begin yet and even i supposed to be keeping mum and pretend i'm blind, unfortunately i can't. darling even i worked in health sector i hardly have a degree in psychiatry and contrary to others i don't want to make assumptions, for whatever profile i can put together about this person will only be nothing but guesses since i don't really know him in person. like you said in FB he seems normal, so it will be a mistake putting him in a box. i have few theories but that's what they are, merely theories. the real truth i doubt if we can even unearth in this lifetime. thanking elz for making you visible missing you btw hard only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 2:34 pm |
oh come here  and i will put this smiley to simulate the tongue  only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 2:39 pm |
Smiley, Dahlen, I thought about you, and so here I am, quoting you, my dearl..But you changed my nick..I'm ELZ not EBZ...Now, you are trying to combine mine and Bebz..bwahahahahah! Yeah, you were one of the casualties...But, don't worry, dahlen...It's a wheel of fortune..If yah can see the devil now, he'll take no more leave, because the next time he gets bedridden...that will be IT for him..So, if I were him...REPENT! REPENT! REPENT! could you imagine if we combined our forces? if i don't believe you got a good heart i would be thinking you are praying/wishing for someone to pass away  only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 2:42 pm |
History repeats itself, my dear..for you to see...We were like this about the same time last year, till July...If I remember it right..You were hibernating at that time...But this is exactly the replica... gee, i hope it will not be the pattern for the years to come and crossing my fingers that it will not go that far. again. but i guess we/you will not let it happen, would we/you? only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 3:07 pm |
Bebz, sweetie..The OLD guy admitted to being really sick for 6 months, and when he returned, he was telling everyone of his "near-death" stories...Dunno if that was true though...I mean, if that was his second chance at life, believe me, I'll BE EXTRA NICE!...But nope! you missed the time when everything here went ugly and we lost most of the good bloggers (namelessfaceless,liz,smiley, sulei,DonatoNY and many more)...the old guy went rakatakatak with his shotgun or UZI and fired at anyone on the spot...hitting even the innocents..At that time, he had a female accomplice...It was the worst in the history of FFF Bloglandia..People were hiding, for fear of being the next target...and that's when we all gathered our forces, and fought till the end. You don't know how many hours I spent on the phone talking to the California office and reported, copied all his threats (which he deleted each time, so as not to leave any trace of his evil crime)...It was indeed a war to remember, and as much as possible, I do not want to go through that again...It's very exhausting! and it's NOT NEEDED anyway...It's all about being the TOP BLOGGER thingie...He wanted the top rank...By the way, you and Honey_Sense were not around...was that a mere coincidence?  Just call me ELZ
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1/9/2011 5:49 pm |
i have these thoughts... (which in reality is really someone else's)  that written communication is more challenging than verbal because it comes without cues. There are times when no offense is intended but the words don’t show a smile or a shrug.They don’t portray body language and so we get stuck in confrontations that might not otherwise exist. only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 8:32 pm |
Bebz, sweetie..The OLD guy admitted to being really sick for 6 months, and when he returned, he was telling everyone of his "near-death" stories...Dunno if that was true though...I mean, if that was his second chance at life, believe me, I'll BE EXTRA NICE!...But nope! you missed the time when everything here went ugly and we lost most of the good bloggers (namelessfaceless,liz,smiley, sulei,DonatoNY and many more)...the old guy went rakatakatak with his shotgun or UZI and fired at anyone on the spot...hitting even the innocents..At that time, he had a female accomplice...It was the worst in the history of FFF Bloglandia..People were hiding, for fear of being the next target...and that's when we all gathered our forces, and fought till the end. You don't know how many hours I spent on the phone talking to the California office and reported, copied all his threats (which he deleted each time, so as not to leave any trace of his evil crime)...It was indeed a war to remember, and as much as possible, I do not want to go through that again...It's very exhausting! and it's NOT NEEDED anyway...It's all about being the TOP BLOGGER thingie...He wanted the top rank...By the way, you and Honey_Sense were not around...was that a mere coincidence? i don't know about the mere coincidence elz and i have no idea what you mean by that but i don't want to be paranoid anyway how people could be sure that his accomplice is a female and not another ghost handle of him? and why this person is helping him coveting the top rank? and if he really wants no:1 position that bad he could have done what he always did before, creating more handles. to me rank doesn't matter or otherwise i didn't ceased blogging couple of months ago. everyone has each own distinctive style and followers and nobody can be all at the same time besides nobody can control what people want to read or which blogs they want to comment. being number one is a fleeting occurance and in my point of view nobody has to attach some significance to it. there is a season for everything. some people have to undertand that not everyone has the same track of mind or similar values. pity i didn't witness yours and others heroic deeds last year because i was busy trying to fix (my) real problems in real life. i just voiced out my thoughts about what i see happening around here lately. if it bothers some people, then it's their problem not mine. this is just a cyber space. it is not really important when it comes to it (at least, to me it’s not) This is just a mere hobby, a passing time, something to do when I can’t go out because of some health issue. i'm grateful for the interaction but each of us have a real life to come back to. there is a world outside fff, i hope some people would realize that. only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/9/2011 8:45 pm |
i'm receiving hate mails from left and right and they are quite threatening including from someone who hates me for no apparent reason. what i did to this person to be vicious and vindictive? this somebody even advising some people to stay away from me trying to poison people's mind and why? as far as i know i never harm someone around here. in fact, i often choose to ignore malicious attacks on my person. to those who are doing this, you know who you are. get real people, have a life. only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/10/2011 2:29 pm |
i'm receiving hate mails from left and right and they are quite threatening including from someone who hates me for no apparent reason. what i did to this person to be vicious and vindictive? this somebody even advising some people to stay away from me trying to poison people's mind and why? as far as i know i never harm someone around here. in fact, i often choose to ignore malicious attacks on my person. to those who are doing this, you know who you are. get real people, have a life. That's real cowardice. I'd those kinds of e-mails before from a notorious moderator of a ghost group who was trashing the names of good members to try to get me on their side. I just posted the e-mail for people to see what kind of crap s/he spews. within each one of us, and let it begin with me (and each one of us)..one breath at a time.
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1/10/2011 6:06 pm |
Rubber ducky can't get his head off the mud.justine4u Justine4u here,thanks to the old guy who is acting like 6 yr old boy.
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1/10/2011 8:32 pm |
Rubber Duckie, you're the one, You make bathtime lots of fun, Rubber Duckie, I'm awfully fond of you; Woo woo be doo Rubber Duckie, joy of joys, When I squeeze you, you make noise! Rubber Duckie, you're my very best friend, it's true! Doo doo doo doo, doo doo Every day when I Make my way to the tubby I find a little fella who's Cute and yellow and chubby Rub-a-dub-a-dubby! Rubber Duckie, you're so fine And I'm lucky that you're mine Rubber Duckie, I'm awfully fond of you. Every day when I Make my way to the tubby I find a little fella who's Cute and yellow and chubby Rubber Duckie, you're so fine And I'm lucky that you're mine Rubber Duckie, I'm awfully fond of - Rubber Duckie, I'd like a whole pond of - Rubber Duckie I'm awfully fond of you! Doo doo, be doo Justine4u here,thanks to the old guy who is acting like 6 yr old boy.
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1/11/2011 5:01 am |
Why resort to hate e-mails? That's real cowardice. I'd those kinds of e-mails before from a notorious moderator of a ghost group who was trashing the names of good members to try to get me on their side. I just posted the e-mail for people to see what kind of crap s/he spews. i'm starting to be really paranoid i don't know anymore who to believe or trust one person's doing can have domino effect a single stone can make ripplles that can be seen/affect the whole body of water i will not be surprise if one of these days i cannot log on anymore like with my old account only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/11/2011 5:02 am |
I would love to see this person every one is personally attacking  on this Blog  Now I must go and read some comments again, because they are really mean toward someone on FFF [image] only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/11/2011 5:04 am |
Rubber ducky can't get his head off the mud.justine4u i was looking for you yesterday and when i cannot find you i thought: oh my god! another one missing! only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/11/2011 5:23 am |
Rubber Duckie, you're the one, You make bathtime lots of fun, Rubber Duckie, I'm awfully fond of you; Woo woo be doo Rubber Duckie, joy of joys, When I squeeze you, you make noise! Rubber Duckie, you're my very best friend, it's true! Doo doo doo doo, doo doo Every day when I Make my way to the tubby I find a little fella who's Cute and yellow and chubby Rub-a-dub-a-dubby! Rubber Duckie, you're so fine And I'm lucky that you're mine Rubber Duckie, I'm awfully fond of you. Every day when I Make my way to the tubby I find a little fella who's Cute and yellow and chubby Rubber Duckie, you're so fine And I'm lucky that you're mine Rubber Duckie, I'm awfully fond of - Rubber Duckie, I'd like a whole pond of - Rubber Duckie I'm awfully fond of you! Doo doo, be doo  only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/11/2011 5:32 am |
To you. You know who you are. Stop these malicious attacks behind my back. Unlike some I can sort out my priorities. (Meaning: real life first) the rest is disposable. Read my lips: what is important to you is not important to me, get it? If this is the only world you know, then I pity you. Why don’t you tell yourself what I always remind myself when interacting online… that whatever happens here has nothing to do with and will not affect people in real world. This is cyber space for crying out loud. What do you think you can possibly achieve by making others look bad? A(n) illusion/delusion of grandeur? Get a life. I real one I mean. only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/11/2011 2:16 pm |
Bastos justine4u..  you have your own blog to do it i appreciate civility from anyone who visits here i don't want name calling in my space if you cannot do that, then please leave i will not tolerate people who wants to use my blog as a battleground of some sort or as a commercial billboard i know you understand only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/11/2011 8:44 pm |
people i just banned somebody from my blog so if i disappear, you all know why. only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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1/13/2011 3:09 pm |
Please don't disappear... Oyyy quack quack zip it and whoever else is helping you. Get a life! You disappear enough for long periods without being done by someone else. within each one of us, and let it begin with me (and each one of us)..one breath at a time.
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1/13/2011 4:28 pm |
Please don't disappear... Oyyy quack quack zip it and whoever else is helping you. Get a life! You disappear enough for long periods without being done by someone else. now i hope everyone respects each others individuality, freedom of speech and the right to exists. this is a make believe world. no one could possibly gain anything by being nasty and going behind someone else's back. let us be one harmonious peaceful true community. only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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