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| Blogs > LadyEros > Eros in Love |
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The Witching Hour Are you one of those people who has a hard time sleeping at night? Well, I am. I'm an insomniac, has been for over 10 years now. It is during this witching hour that I lay in bed at night and wonder about LIFE. I think about the things I've done and berate myself for the mistakes I've made. I congratulate myself for the wise decisions and I mull over the decisions I still have to make. But most of the time, I lay awake at night with my head filled with questions...why things turned out the way they did, how can I change it, avoid it or better it. When will things change or when will the right time come. Now, these questions can pertain to anything. It can be anything inane or it could even be something...profound. Sometimes I don't mind being an insomniac. For sometimes this is the only time I actually feel peace. But there are times I curse the day I ever became one. Because there are times when peace is elusive and I am at my most vulnerable...and tonight, as sleep eludes me once again, it has chosen to take my peace of mind with it. I am filled with disappointment so deep. My mind filled with questions unanswered. What happened? What went wrong? Why did it turn out this way? There is nothing worse than not knowing. I wish I knew the answers. I wish I knew where to find them....if only... I hate to end this in such a melancholy note...but, hey it's one of those nights. 
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10/8/2012 4:22 pm |
Not insomniac, but there are times when something troubles for instance, something I knew that I said wrong or made a mistake in work or an interview or a test. I'd go over it in my head to think of what I could do better next time.   within each one of us, and let it begin with me (and each one of us)..one breath at a time.
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10/8/2012 3:30 am |
And I also stopped worrying that at my age, I am still loveless...Instead, I loved MYSELF more... Just call me ELZ 
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10/8/2012 3:27 am |
I've been an insomniac for a long time too. But that was because I worried a lot about so many things. I noticed that when I had more money (which were the aftermath of more hardwork), I spent more, and I worried more, and got stressed out even more. I worried that I didn't have time to go out and enjoy life because I had to work not only to support myself, but my loved ones, specially my unico hijo...When my kid was on his own and left home, and with the economy globally down, that's when I realized that there a lot of things in my life that can be SIMPLIFIED...I started the "what the heck!" attitude. Whatever little or big resources I had, I use them to have fun. Less work, that's fine! I traveled more using my credit cards, shopped the things that I enjoyed the most, and I'd say, going back to the gym and do ZUMBA DANCING helped me a lot to get my body back to the rhythm where I can be tired but having fun, enough to put me to a good night's sleep...Another thing that helped me is when I stopped worrying at how much money I earned, spent, or saved. When I couldn't send enough money anymore to my relatives back home due to limited resources, "what the heck!" they've strong bones to work!...I also stopped worrying about "tomorrow", and just kept enjoying each day..Believe me, these things helped me a lot. I used to take benadryl, and unisom to help me sleep, but naaaaaahhh!...NOT ANYMORE! Just call me ELZ
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10/7/2012 5:16 pm |
i can relate... only dead fish go with the flow ~ JolieLaide
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