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 | Blogs > mitosis > My Blog > Why Can't We Be Friends... |
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mitosis
6/4/2008 11:42 am |
I really had a lot of readings about dating, and i certainly had this article impressed my whole being --- learning and being taught of how dating is! The world is full of advice when it comes to dating and trying to find your “soul mate.” Just turn on the TV and you’ll find all kinds of matchmaking reality shows where everyone is looking for a little romance and the perfect love. People tend to view dating as an opportunity to get intimate with someone; they think it’s a time to “try things out” without the commitment of marriage. But if you follow the world’s advice when it comes to dating, you could end up heartbroken and alone. When people go out on dates, they usually put their “game faces” on. They take you to the best places and say all the right things in order to impress you. This makes romance very exciting, but it can also foster infatuation and illusion. The Bible says in Song of Solomon 8:4 (AMP), “I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that you never [again attempt to] stir up or awaken love until it pleases.” In other words, don’t be quick to jump into intimacy with anyone. Even within the church, many Christians hurry to engage in romance because they’re lonely. Or worse, they rush straight to the altar just to avoid sexual sin. But it’s important to take things slowly. If you want real romance, you must build your relationship on the foundation of friendship. The primary motivation for any friendship should be service. According to1 John 3:16, we should lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters because of the love that Christ showed toward us. With that in mind, you should begin to see your relationships as an opportunity to model the agape kind of love, or love that is spiritual and selfless in nature. This means taking the time to learn a person’s likes, dislikes, needs and desires. It means looking for ways to edify that person. Find out what makes that person feel the love of God—it could be a kind word, a nice gift, a thoughtful deed or simply spending quality time with him or her. The only way to really get to know someone is by being a true friend. The friendship stage is also the time to find out where a person is in his or her walk with God. Does she smoke, drink and party, but have little time for church and the things of God? Is he constantly working on discipline and pursuing the will of God for his life? These are important things to consider. Friends help each other develop in the Word of God and maximize each other’s potential. Dating too soon could distract you or the person you’re dating, and that could hinder the spiritual growth of both of you. Instead of rushing into romance, make building a deeper friendship your first priority. Take your time getting to know and understand the person you’re interested in. Have fun together. Cherish the moments of friendship where you can laugh, joke, talk and enjoy each other’s company. That’s what establishes a solid, healthy relationship and sustains you through the rough times. If you are already in a romantic relationship, it’s not too late to ask yourself some important questions: “Why am I dating this person?” “Is there a potential for us to get married?” “Have we built a solid foundation of friendship?” “Am I still lonely?” The answers may surprise you, but your willingness to build your relationship on the foundation of a solid friendship will help you create the long-lasting romance you desire. (Ref: CDMinistries) It s not really too late for everything... regardless what stage or age we are in life now, right? |
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 6/4/2008 8:00 pm |
The last paragraph is perhaps the most unanswered question in a relationship. Mostly it is how the other person makes you feel rather than your willingness to give without reciprocation. Love is the culmination and epitome of real friendship between a man and a woman. I agree that it is never too late..(smile)
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6/5/2008 12:45 am |
i agree..
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6/5/2008 8:07 pm |
What a wonderful article. Thanks for sharing. It is definitely in giving that we receive.
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7/12/2008 2:04 pm |
Friendship is a comforting smile, a familiar voice that warms the heart, and the freedom to be the person God intended.
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