Heart or Pride
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As I was thinking of some girls with broken hearts, the following question came to my mind: Is it the heart, or the pride of a woman that she feels was broken after she break up with her husband or bf? and nevertheless which one she really feels broken, what could be more hurting, breaking a woman heart, or breaking her pride? in other words, is it really all the same for all women in such a situation feeling the pain, or it differes from someone to another, and what counts more to a woman, her heart or pride? The relevant qustion is, is it all the same for a married woman being cheated by her husband, and a girl who was cheated by her bf? I mean would it be different, heart or pride that was broken when it comes a married or unmarried woman, or married ones care more for their prides rather than their hearts? This blog is meant or expected to be commented on mostly by women, but guys are even welcomed if they have a say about it! 
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9/18/2009 7:06 pm |
Mars and Venus? Nope. The only problem between the genders is that we each have the others needs and wants backwards. Men want to be needed, and women need to be wanted. Not the other way around. It's that simple! Happy Weekend..  *It's all said & done, it's real, and it's been fun.*
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9/18/2009 8:11 pm |
Mars and Venus? Nope. The only problem between the genders is that we each have the others needs and wants backwards. Men want to be needed, and women need to be wanted. Not the other way around. It's that simple! Happy Weekend.. very logical to me! i can only agree with that! have a great weekend too
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9/19/2009 4:34 am |
Mia, I think I replied to this comment which I appreciated so much and do agree with it totally, but FFF again are holding some comments! lol let us wait and see when do they release them.  have a happy weekend
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9/19/2009 5:12 am |
none of the two ......the problem is ......losing each others NEEDs ......in any aspect .........
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9/19/2009 5:16 am |
none of the two ......the problem is......losing each others NEEDs......in any aspect.................if it ever happens to me the HEART might a big matter..........then my PRIDE of course........and then the REVENGE will come out
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9/19/2009 6:35 am |
speaking from personal experience (hehe)... - if you really loved the guy, then the heart is broken. if not, then it's the pride that's affected. the emotional UNinvolvement could be intentional or not - sometimes we only realize that we really loved the person (or not) after something goes wrong and it's your reaction to it that reveals your true feelings. - the heart is worse, of course. it's easy or at least possible to rebuild hurt pride, but a crushed heart never really becomes the same again, regardless of what they say about time healing wounds and all that. - the only difference between a heartbroken married woman vs a single one is that when you're still single (and you didnt have kids together), there is a sense of relief that even though you made a mistake in trusting that person, at least you wont have a lifetime connection that a marriage would have forced on you... at least, that's what I felt
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9/19/2009 8:38 am |
none of the two ......the problem is......losing each others NEEDs......in any aspect......... meaning this "need" can be fulfilled by and "guy"!
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9/19/2009 8:39 am |
just kidding ........if it ever happens to me the HEART might a big matter..........then my PRIDE of course........and then the REVENGE will come out
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9/19/2009 8:42 am |
speaking from personal experience (hehe)... - if you really loved the guy, then the heart is broken. if not, then it's the pride that's affected. the emotional UNinvolvement could be intentional or not - sometimes we only realize that we really loved the person (or not) after something goes wrong and it's your reaction to it that reveals your true feelings. - the heart is worse, of course. it's easy or at least possible to rebuild hurt pride, but a crushed heart never really becomes the same again, regardless of what they say about time healing wounds and all that. - the only difference between a heartbroken married woman vs a single one is that when you're still single (and you didnt have kids together), there is a sense of relief that even though you made a mistake in trusting that person, at least you wont have a lifetime connection that a marriage would have forced on you... at least, that's what I felt in brief u mean to say the heart comes first too? well.. the other question now, is it different from a man to a woman? you think a man would care more for his pride, where a woman cares more for her heart?
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9/19/2009 9:02 am |
Good morning Sulei, It's the heart that is deeply broken. Pride doesn't come close. The soul is deeply hurt. And it takes a long time to heal... [I God is pure love...
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9/19/2009 12:10 pm |
Heart or pride? Very interesting question Sulei. Perhaps it depends on what it at stake and how it ended regardless of gender. The more emotionally involved the couple were or at least one of them (ie. have kids or not, married or not, truly love the person rather than lusted after the person or not), the more it hurts the heart rather than the pride. The more intensely you love someone the more your heart feels the pain. Whereas, if you only invested in a relationship with time, usually a short time and money, but not loved nor really care enough for each other's feelings, then you're more likely to be hurt with pride rather than hurt your heart. Love melts away the selfish underpinnings we have for ourselves that gets in the way of loving someone else and not just yourself, which leads to pride. In short, love dissolves pride.   
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9/19/2009 2:04 pm |
sulei dear, we don't care about pride if we really love our man...have a nice weekend dear...
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9/19/2009 4:52 pm |
Good morning Sulei, It's the heart that is deeply broken. Pride doesn't come close. The soul is deeply hurt. And it takes a long time to heal... it is all clear! thanks for sharing ur thoughts and have a nice Sunday
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9/19/2009 4:56 pm |
it goes hand and hand be it be pride or heart it all boils down to breaking ones trust and eventually giving another chance or totally closing the door. as for me, chances are given with restrictions or consequences. we are all adults to talk about it specially if we need to consider the people involve around us and the degree of damage done. weighing this and that, will eventually turn out with a win win solution at the end. What you read, what you hear, leave it here!
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9/19/2009 5:09 pm |
Heart or pride? Very interesting question Sulei. Perhaps it depends on what it at stake and how it ended regardless of gender. The more emotionally involved the couple were or at least one of them (ie. have kids or not, married or not, truly love the person rather than lusted after the person or not), the more it hurts the heart rather than the pride. The more intensely you love someone the more your heart feels the pain. Whereas, if you only invested in a relationship with time, usually a short time and money, but not loved nor really care enough for each other's feelings, then you're more likely to be hurt with pride rather than hurt your heart. Love melts away the selfish underpinnings we have for ourselves that gets in the way of loving someone else and not just yourself, which leads to pride. In short, love dissolves pride. and I'm really thankful for your addition, and full reply! Yet, I was wondering, does it have to do with the culture and education of a woman to feel differently towards whether it is her heart or pride that is hurt? I have known and heard a lot of stories of women in my region "Middle East" complaining about their pride that was severely hurt after they discovered that their men were cheating them! well, it is surly becoming more interesting here with all the similar replies of the ladies, and i don't deny my surprise
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9/19/2009 5:12 pm |
sulei dear, we don't care about pride if we really love our man...have a nice weekend dear...
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9/19/2009 5:22 pm |
it goes hand and hand be it be pride or heart it all boils down to breaking ones trust and eventually giving another chance or totally closing the door. as for me, chances are given with restrictions or consequences. we are all adults to talk about it specially if we need to consider the people involve around us and the degree of damage done. weighing this and that, will eventually turn out with a win win solution at the end.
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9/20/2009 9:11 am |
hello Janey, nice to see u back here and I'm really thankful for your addition, and full reply! Yet, I was wondering, does it have to do with the culture and education of a woman to feel differently towards whether it is her heart or pride that is hurt? I have known and heard a lot of stories of women in my region "Middle East" complaining about their pride that was severely hurt after they discovered that their men were cheating them! well, it is surly becoming more interesting here with all the similar replies of the ladies, and i don't deny my surprise What is apparent is that Middle Eastern women don't have as much equal opportunity rights as other women in the western parts of the world or the westernized part of the world. This could possibly help explain why their pride hurts more. Cultural differences is certainly something to look into. Seems like the role of the heart is very much valued in Filipino culture. This isn't necessarily the same in other cultures, other body parts could be seen as more valuable or just as valuable as the heart for eg. the role of brain, stomach, kidney, hands...
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9/20/2009 1:38 pm |
when a relationship ends,the whole you will be shattered and turns your self into pieces,pain is inevitable thus it's hard to know which one was deeply hurt....the more intimate the relationship was and the more it lasted, the more painful it would be. heart and soul(pride)do come along in serious relationships,the cause of the break up will determine what was really hurt the most-your heart or your pride.in many cases,one of the major cause of relationship break ups is philandering,sad to know but it's a fact,and if that's the case i think both heart and pride are just but equally hurt,down and wounded... very relevant and interesting topic Sulie,keep it up
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9/20/2009 7:54 pm |
hi sulei my say... when a married woman is cheated...it's complicated...u can't just walk away...u have kids to consider...and their hearts are broken too...and u know mom's feel so much for their kids...and so they are torn between two decisions of whether... staying for the sake of the kids(and that's a sign of actually swallowing one's pride )  ...or the decision of...getting out of the relationship no matter whatwhile if a gurl is single...and cheated by her BF ONLY...it's easier to just go away....split...no worries (but just a little bit of pain ) but in general...married or not...a woman is always left with a broken heart and a wounded pride   i'm like a bird! 
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9/21/2009 3:00 am |
Hey, lets not talk about broken hearts here.....let's be happy instead, atleast, we have this LIFE
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9/21/2009 6:09 pm |
Since I hardly know anything about Middle Eastern culture, you'd be more than qualified Sulei to understand the cultural differences than the rest of us ladies here. What is apparent is that Middle Eastern women don't have as much equal opportunity rights as other women in the western parts of the world or the westernized part of the world. This could possibly help explain why their pride hurts more. Cultural differences is certainly something to look into. Seems like the role of the heart is very much valued in Filipino culture. This isn't necessarily the same in other cultures, other body parts could be seen as more valuable or just as valuable as the heart for eg. the role of brain, stomach, kidney, hands...
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9/21/2009 6:14 pm |
when a relationship ends,the whole you will be shattered and turns your self into pieces,pain is inevitable thus it's hard to know which one was deeply hurt....the more intimate the relationship was and the more it lasted, the more painful it would be. heart and soul(pride)do come along in serious relationships,the cause of the break up will determine what was really hurt the most-your heart or your pride.in many cases,one of the major cause of relationship break ups is philandering,sad to know but it's a fact,and if that's the case i think both heart and pride are just but equally hurt,down and wounded... very relevant and interesting topic Sulie,keep it up
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9/21/2009 6:22 pm |
hi sulei my say... when a married woman is cheated...it's complicated...u can't just walk away...u have kids to consider...and their hearts are broken too...and u know mom's feel so much for their kids...and so they are torn between two decisions of whether... staying for the sake of the kids(and that's a sign of actually swallowing one's pride ) ...or the decision of...getting out of the relationship no matter whatwhile if a gurl is single...and cheated by her BF ONLY...it's easier to just go away....split...no worries (but just a little bit of pain )but in general...married or not...a woman is always left with a broken heart and a wounded pride
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9/21/2009 6:24 pm |
Hey, lets not talk about broken hearts here.....let's be happy instead, atleast, we have this LIFE but the problem remains there, even when we close our eyes and pretend to be not seeing it!
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9/21/2009 11:45 pm |
I am using my Heart most of the time...always forgot that there is ego or pride. The great thing about listening to my heart is I never have to fight my emotions. Instead I embrace the very emotions that define me as an individual. In this way, there is no second thought on what I have done is right or wrong,simply because my heart knows what is right for me in any moment based on my emotional needs, body needs etc… Ofcourse, this means I live a simple life where happiness, peace and love means a lot to me than "money" . If you have not figured it out, Its always been a Broken Hearted Diamond
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9/22/2009 12:21 am |
and here's another bla bla bla of mr sulieman smile and be happy always
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9/22/2009 4:56 pm |
I am using my Heart most of the time...always forgot that there is ego or pride. The great thing about listening to my heart is I never have to fight my emotions. Instead I embrace the very emotions that define me as an individual. In this way, there is no second thought on what I have done is right or wrong,simply because my heart knows what is right for me in any moment based on my emotional needs, body needs etc… Ofcourse, this means I live a simple life where happiness, peace and love means a lot to me than "money" . If you have not figured it out, Its always been a Broken Hearted Diamond  people who care for their pride, are like palm trees, they die standing!
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9/22/2009 4:58 pm |
and here's another bla bla bla of mr sulieman what happened to your marriage plans? was is also just a bla bla bla?
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9/22/2009 9:56 pm |
hello Ms. Broken_Hearted_Diamond people who care for their pride, are like palm trees, they die standing!
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9/23/2009 2:28 am |
Can you please teach me how to use my pride correctly? So that i will also die standing?
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9/23/2009 6:02 am |
based on psychology, each of us have our own unique personality, it means we may be experiencing the same situation and yet we react and feel differently.take the case of identical twins who grew up in separate areas, one was raised in the city while the other from the countryside. the city raised twin is most likely to be more liberated in ideals, might be more outgoing whereas the country raised twin might be more reserved and be a homebuddy. going back to the questions, i think each woman who would comment here has her own share of experience as to what degree of pain, loss or isolation she felt when she was heartbroken. whether she considers pride or heart that was broken is also subjective. on a personal note, i think my pride was hurt when one of my ex's left me amidst all my efforts and sacrifices (based on self evaluation, i looked at the love i gave as emotional investment and so when i was left i really felt the "loss" of what i invested) whereas my heart was really crushed when i was cheated by another ex whom i thought at that time as my MR. RIGHT. I made him my world, accepted his flaws and embraced his weaknesses not only his strengths. Pride was unknown to me at that time coz I never got angry, I forgave him easily.
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9/27/2009 6:41 am |
based on psychology, each of us have our own unique personality, it means we may be experiencing the same situation and yet we react and feel differently.take the case of identical twins who grew up in separate areas, one was raised in the city while the other from the countryside. the city raised twin is most likely to be more liberated in ideals, might be more outgoing whereas the country raised twin might be more reserved and be a homebuddy. going back to the questions, i think each woman who would comment here has her own share of experience as to what degree of pain, loss or isolation she felt when she was heartbroken. whether she considers pride or heart that was broken is also subjective. on a personal note, i think my pride was hurt when one of my ex's left me amidst all my efforts and sacrifices (based on self evaluation, i looked at the love i gave as emotional investment and so when i was left i really felt the "loss" of what i invested) whereas my heart was really crushed when i was cheated by another ex whom i thought at that time as my MR. RIGHT. I made him my world, accepted his flaws and embraced his weaknesses not only his strengths. Pride was unknown to me at that time coz I never got angry, I forgave him easily.
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9/27/2009 5:02 pm |
based on psychology, each of us have our own unique personality, it means we may be experiencing the same situation and yet we react and feel differently.take the case of identical twins who grew up in separate areas, one was raised in the city while the other from the countryside. the city raised twin is most likely to be more liberated in ideals, might be more outgoing whereas the country raised twin might be more reserved and be a homebuddy. going back to the questions, i think each woman who would comment here has her own share of experience as to what degree of pain, loss or isolation she felt when she was heartbroken. whether she considers pride or heart that was broken is also subjective. on a personal note, i think my pride was hurt when one of my ex's left me amidst all my efforts and sacrifices (based on self evaluation, i looked at the love i gave as emotional investment and so when i was left i really felt the "loss" of what i invested) whereas my heart was really crushed when i was cheated by another ex whom i thought at that time as my MR. RIGHT. I made him my world, accepted his flaws and embraced his weaknesses not only his strengths. Pride was unknown to me at that time coz I never got angry, I forgave him easily.
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9/27/2009 5:05 pm |
does it always have to be like this?my posts and comments appear late as usual!it's frustrating! tease them by your continuous visits, and enough patience, without being frustrated
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9/28/2009 3:15 am |
hello Cielo! thanks for enhancing my work by your great addition! I very well know, ur capable of discussing issues related to human kind, concerning their feelings, thoughts, visions and ..etc! in addition to that, i know u r intellectual enough and even more experienced to make the discussion take new trends and on your own way! thank you very much for sharing your thoughts and experiences, wish you all the best for a better fruitful bright future! read and comment whenever i have the time... take care my friend...
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9/28/2009 3:19 am |
FFF has been makulit with u concerning ur presence at my blogland! tease them by your continuous visits, and enough patience, without being frustrated
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9/30/2009 2:02 am |
WOW! Very informative blog! Thanks, Sir Sulei. But I pray that I will never experience BOTH!
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9/30/2009 6:12 pm |
i always say that i embrace perversions and human imperfections to make other people less perverts! lol... being open minded and thinking of solutions to any problem is what i am willing to do.glad to be of help in sharing my ideas, thoughts and feelings regarding the topics u have here... it's interesting and is full of sense that's why i keep coming back to read and comment whenever i have the time... take care my friend...
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9/30/2009 6:15 pm |
lol,i think so too!oh well then i might as well visit your blog more often just feel at home my dear!
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9/30/2009 6:17 pm |
WOW! Very informative blog! Thanks, Sir Sulei. But I pray that I will never experience BOTH! thanks for your visit my friend .
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10/1/2009 7:50 am |
oh! yes i also believe that facing imperfection, is more helpful to than neglecting them, if we do care to change the image and make it look brighter! The thing is in such situation, one deals with human trends and reasons behind them! one of the most repeated phenomenas is when a person suffers having a double contradicting personalities! such cases, do a lot of harm for others! whether it is intended or not, is only one part of the issue, and the question remains; why? as to the issue raised on inflicting harm to others whether it is intended or not, sometimes people are plainly insensitive or are too conceited to notice that their actions tend to hurt other people.... that is just my opinion my friend...
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10/1/2009 7:53 am |
Cielo, don't forget to remind me to give you the key, so that u can enter my blogland immediately and at any time, without having to wait too long at the door just feel at home my dear!
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10/2/2009 4:11 am |
human behavior is so complicated, dynamic and is never stabilized.as we learn additional knowledge, skills and are filled up with emotions we tend to change/evolve continuously.that's why i encourage everyone to be more open minded and should not be resistant to change.as rational beings it is within our makeup that we acquire and learn new things, sometimes we unlearn the old ones and adapt what is recently learned. as to the issue raised on inflicting harm to others whether it is intended or not, sometimes people are plainly insensitive or are too conceited to notice that their actions tend to hurt other people.... that is just my opinion my friend... u can never preassume what would be their next step
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10/2/2009 4:12 am |
that is why some guys need to be tamed, specially poets like me when they become crazily in love! u can never preassume what would be their next step
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10/7/2009 11:21 am |
HMMM.... SULEI,AS I AM READING YOUR WORDS, I THOUGHT OF THE BROKEN HEARTED GUYS I MET I JUST WANT TO SAY, YOUR BLOG IS ONE OF MY FAVES HEARTY REGARDS
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10/7/2009 5:41 pm |
HMMM.... SULEI,AS I AM READING YOUR WORDS, I THOUGHT OF THE BROKEN HEARTED GUYS I MET I JUST WANT TO SAY, YOUR BLOG IS ONE OF MY FAVES HEARTY REGARDS i am glad it reminds u of "guys" broken hearted! it makes me happier each time i see u back here
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10/8/2009 2:26 am |
Quoting Mua_hati: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HMMM.... SULEI,AS I AM READING YOUR WORDS, I THOUGHT OF THE BROKEN HEARTED GUYS I MET I JUST WANT TO SAY, YOUR BLOG IS ONE OF MY FAVES HEARTY REGARDS -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- hello mua i am glad it reminds u of "guys" broken hearted! it makes me happier each time i see u back here -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OCH, SULEI.... FOR THAT I READ YOU LESSER IN ELR HOPE YOU ARE DOING WELL AS ALWAYS, HEARTY REGARDS
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10/8/2009 2:56 am |
Quoting Mua_hati: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HMMM.... SULEI,AS I AM READING YOUR WORDS, I THOUGHT OF THE BROKEN HEARTED GUYS I MET I JUST WANT TO SAY, YOUR BLOG IS ONE OF MY FAVES HEARTY REGARDS -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- hello mua i am glad it reminds u of "guys" broken hearted! it makes me happier each time i see u back here -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OCH, SULEI.... FOR THAT I READ YOU LESSER IN ELR HOPE YOU ARE DOING WELL AS ALWAYS, HEARTY REGARDS but still every body is laughing rather than seeing  red faces all the time showing anger at the elr! the thing is i never understood why those guys fight and what for?
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10/10/2009 9:20 am |
VOILA!!! OK.. FIRST, ITS NORMAL TO USE BAD WORDS WHEN YOU FIGHT. YOU CAN'T FIGHT AND USE GOOD WORDS OR ?? (silly me) WELL, FOR ME PERSONALLY I WOULD FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE IN A PLACE WHERE I DON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD AND CAN'T JOIN INTO A CONVERSTAION (i walways have to say something ) AND JUST BE POSITVE AND THINK THAT PROBABLY THOSE RED FACES JUST GOT TOO MUCH SUN WHY BOTHER TO UNDERSTAND WHAT THOSE GUYS ARE FIGHTING FOR ??? YOU'LL KNOW WHEN YOU GET THEIR AGE !!!  I STILL AM YOUR PRETTIEST SIS ... orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr , SULEI ????  REGARDS !!!!
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